When I think about Phillies pitcher Brett Myers, the last thing that ever crosses my mind is that he needs to be more aggressive. If anything, I think that he's currently up here (/'Duk holds hand near swirling ceiling fan) when he needs to be down around here (/'Duk grabs delicious and chilly Girl Scout thin mints out of freezer).

However, after an 0-1 record and 6.30 ERA over his first two starts, Myers thinks tonight's effort against the Cubs needs to include even more of face-punching, reporter-harrassing and teammate-humiliating side. 

From the Philadelphia Inquirer:

"I'm closing for nine innings (against the Cubs)."

"I've just been flipping crap up there. It wasn't working. I've got to put some type of aggression behind it."

"In spring training, I was doo-dooing stuff up there, and I was getting outs, so I figured I could take it into the season. Well, guess what? It doesn't work, because when the lights go on, it's a little different."

The attitude of a fired-up closer for nine innings? Uh, sure Brett. Let me know how that works out for you. You've always done such a great job of corralling your temper and related emotions.

Meanwhile, I'll let any Cubs fans in Philadelphia know that they should be sitting in the second level tonight. It's fun to watch Bruce Banner transform into the Hulk after a six-run third, but it's also probably better to do so from a distance.