Landmark day in the world of Tiger Woods; he's landed his first new endorsement since The Transgression! Sure, Gillette and General Motors and AT&T and pretty much everybody else except Nike and EA Sports bailed on Tiger, but he's coming back, baby! So what is it? Luxury auto? High-end watch? Top-flight Scotch?
Er ... no.
Woods will be shilling pain rub.
Yep, the onetime world's greatest golfer will now be a paid spokesman for ... you know what? I'm just going to quote directly from the press release:
"Kowa Company Ltd. is pleased to announce the use of Tiger Woods as the image character of Antiphlogistic Analgetic Vantelin Kowa series."
Awesome. "Image character." Even press releases in Japan sound like voiceover intros for epic anime cartoons. (And "antiphlogistic" is a great word.) Commercials featuring Woods will begin airing in Japan in mid-July, and you can bet we'll be running them here as soon as we get our hands on 'em.
Many celebrities who want some endorsement coin without "cheapening" their image in America turn to Japan. (See: Ben Stiller, John Travolta and Nicolas Cage.) Woods endorsed iced coffee in Japan, but alas, we can't find any video of that. Yet.
Also, no idea when Woods will be back. But when he's hurting, we now know where he'll turn.