"I will not pee in your cup!"
Win or lose, the World Cup final will be Netherlands captain Giovanni van Bronckhorst's final match before retirement. And if the Oranje win, he says he won't be wasting his precious post-match party time on any time-consuming FIFA doping tests.
From the Mirror:
"I am not doing the dope test. This is my last game and last time I came off the pitch [after the semifinal], I was left isolated and I missed the party.
"That was a shame. It took one hour and 15 minutes but luckily I got permission to go to the locker room when Prince Willem-Alexander and Princess Maxima were there."
That's right, Gio isn't going to miss out on the chance to shotgun beers with his teammates before the royals visit again. No, no. Lucky for him, the chances of getting selected again for a post-match drug test are slim. Just two players are randomly selected from one team after every World Cup match for testing, so van Bronckhorst getting picked after two straight matches would be about as implausible as an octopus going six for six in picking winners. Oh wait.
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