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Dirty Tackle

Several things Cristiano Ronaldo doesn’t know

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As he was on his way out of Real Madrid, Jose Mourinho mentioned the one quibble he had with the supremely talented Cristiano Ronaldo during their time together. From Reuters:

"I had only one problem with him, very simple, very basic, which was when a coach criticises a player from a tactical viewpoint trying to improve what in my view could have been improved," [Mourinho] added.

"And at that moment he didn't take it very well because maybe he thinks he knows everything and the coach cannot help him to develop more."

So just to remind Cristiano that we are all flawed creatures, here are several things he doesn't know...

-What the population of Dogana, San Marino is.

-Where babies come from.

-Why ugly people exist.

-Why life isn't fair.

-What time Mad Men is on.

-How magnets work.

-How to eat a McRib.

-How to catch.

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-How to wear a headband.

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-How to sit on the bench.

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-How to locate his collar bone.

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-How to not crash his Ferrari on the way to training.

-How to not look bitter when Lionel Messi wins the Ballon d'Or.

-How to not give people the impression that he thinks he knows everything.

And just for a bit of balance, several things he does know...

-Your grandmother's email password.

-How many hair products a human head can support without causing a neck injury.

-How to score more goals than everyone except Messi.

-How to hold candies just above Messi's reach and laugh while he repeatedly jumps for them until he finally gives up and tells Tito Vilanova.

-How to outlast Jose Mourinho.

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