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Dirty Tackle

Painfully obvious but very helpful tips for Jose Mourinho

Dirty Tackle

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Chelsea opened their Champions League campaign by losing 2-1 to underdog Basel at home. This marked the club's third straight defeat after losing to Bayern Munich on penalties in the UEFA Super Cup and 1-0 to Everton last weekend in the Premier League. As a result of this unexpected misfortune, fans at Stamford Bridge who once used their signs to tell Rafa Benitez to leave the club are now using them to offer Mourinho friendly tips on how to turn things around. "Jose! Mata belongs on the field not the bench!" was advice that Mourinho enacted just before Basel scored both their goals for the shocking comeback win. Should Chelsea's struggles continue, here are several more signs that could appear in the crowd at Stamford Bridge soon.

-Jose! You want to win, not lose!

-Special One! Strikers should score goals, not whatever it is Samuel Eto'o has been doing!

-Mou! You want to make Rafa Benitez look incompetent, not like the greatest manager currently working!

-Jose! Being "The Happy One" is getting you nowhere, go back to being a miserable, paranoid jerkwagon!

-Person pretending to be Jose Mourinho! Don't call your players "beautiful young eggs," so the press can't use a terrible variety of egg puns to describe results!

-Rafa out!

-Portuguese guy! It's still too early to judge anything, but I simply can't help myself from doing exactly that! I don't know what's wrong with me! Also, my arms hurt from holding up this sign for so long! Please send help!

-Someone should check on Roberto Di Matteo just to make sure he's getting out of the house enough!

-Jose! Roman Abramovich is probably going to sack you no matter what happens, so start stealing office supplies now!

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