After suggesting that Stewart Downing may need to convert to a left back to salvage his Liverpool career, new manager Brendan Rodgers has changed his mind and decided that the winger's future can only be in the club's accounting department.
"He's good with numbers," Rodgers said of Downing. "That's certain. When I first arrived here I asked all the outfield players to add up all the goals they scored last season and then divide that by the number of assists they had and write that number down on a piece of paper. Stewart was the first to complete the task and when asked if he checked his answer he said, 'Everyday...' and then he got real quiet like one of those sad people you see in offices. That's when I knew he'd better serve us as an accountant than someone who goes anywhere near the pitch."
Liverpool paid £20 million for Downing last summer, but like many of previous manager Kenny Dalglish's other signings, he's fallen out of favor in the new regime. But Rodgers remains confident that he can find a place for these players if they can't be sold.
"Time will tell whether Stewart can do it. I don't like to just give up on players. I always look at different ways we can use them. For example, if Andy Carroll stays, I see him serving as a coat rack in one of the hospitality suites. And Charlie Adam may have a future as a bean bag chair. I had a chat with him on the role and he's excited about it. That's the biggest thing."