Fantasy Football 2014:

Dirty Tackle

If it continued… (Barcelona v Real Madrid)

Brooks Peck
Dirty Tackle

Now let's compare their goal celebrations! (Getty)

Cristiano Ronaldo and Lionel Messi had two goals each to produce a 2-2 draw in the first Clasico of the last several hours, leaving both sides somewhat satisfied, but everyone else somewhat unfulfilled. So, that leaves us to ask the only question (besides "Did wearing a Barcelona shirt have anything to do with Lady Gaga vomiting during a concert?) you can of such a match: What if it continued?

97' -- Cristiano Ronaldo scores, clearly proving he is the best player in the world.

101' -- Lionel Messi scores, clearly proving he is  the best player in the world.

108' -- Kaka decides that trying extra hard to show that he is back in form in order to prove his detractors wrong would just be too mean.

113' -- Tito Vilanova wonders if he can get away with playing a Pique-impregnated Shakira at centerback.

117' -- A lone Barcelona fans realizes that shining laser pointers in the eyes of opposing players is incredibly stupid and will likely have horrific consequences in the after-life. He continues doing it anyway.

120' -- Lionel Messi scores, clearly proving he is the best player the world.

125' -- Cristiano Ronaldo scores, clearly proving he is the best player in the world.

129' -- Alex Song and Luka Modric use sign language to reminisce about the days when they used to play all the time from their respective benches so they don't hear each other's voices crack when they speak.

132' -- Sergio Ramos blinks twice, which shows that he wants to murder Jose Mourinho with a lead pipe in the conservatory.

137' -- Pepe accuses Andres Iniesta of diving earlier in the match because all of Iniesta's limbs are still attached to his body.

141' -- Pep Guardiola gets a shiver in his penthouse apartment in New York City. He puts on a third vest and a second skinny tie.

150' -- Cristiano Ronaldo and Lionel Messi somehow manage to score at exactly the same time, but since there can only be one best player in the world, this gives football fans across the planet crippling migraine headaches as they try to process the destruction of their hyperbolic, mutually exclusive reality. Everyone agrees to forget that this ever happened and carry on fighting about which player truly is the absolute best.

151' -- Pele says it's definitely Neymar.

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League type:
Free Yahoo League
League size:
10 players
Draft time:
Aug 27 9:00 am
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