Like Liverpool before them, money-enriched Russian club Anzhi needed a rap song about them. But instead of going the Liverpool route and having the players do it themselves, Anzhi brought in Russian rapper Timaro to do the heavy lifting while members of the squad served as video filler.

The whole thing is pretty straight forward, but the best part of the video is manager Guus Hiddink's very brief cameo towards the end.

Artur Boruc, feeling left out. (Getty)

AAAAHHHHHHHH I AM ARTUR BORUC AND THIS IS A LIST OF THINGS THAT MADE ME ANGRY THIS WEEK:

1. DELIO ROSSI ATTACKING ADEM LJAJIC IN THE DUGOUT -- THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE DISHEARTENED TO BE A MEMBER OF THIS FIORENTINA TEAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I MEAN WHY COULDN'T IT BE ME?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!??!?! ALL I HAVE EVER WANTED WAS FOR MY MANAGER TO VICIOUSLY ATTACK ME DURING A MATCH AND IT HAS NEVER HAPPENED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THEN ALL LJAJIC HAS TO DO IS GIVE ROSSI A SARCASTIC CLAP AND SUDDENLY HE'S ON HIM LIKE MAYONNAISE ON DIMITAR BERBATOV!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH I THINK I'M GETTING A JEALOUSLY RASH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2. DELIO ROSSI'S APOLOGY FOR SACKING LJAJIC -- HE SHOULDN'T HAVE TO APOLOGIZE FOR THIS!!!!!!!!!!! THE TEAM NEEDED A KICK IN THE PANTS SO ROSSI GAVE LJAJIC A SLAP ON THE HEAD!!!!!!!!! REPEATEDLY!!!!!!!!!!! WHILE TRYING TO STRANGLE HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE ONLY THING I REGRET IS THAT NOW THAT DELIO IS GONE THE NEW MANAGER PROBABLY WON'T BE NEARLY AS A WILLING TO FIGHT HIS PLAYERS DURING MATCHES!!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS DISAPPOINTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

3. LJAJIC'S FATHER WANTING TO PRESS CHARGES AGAINST ROSSI --  THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AN OLD MAN ATTACKS A 20-YEAR-OLD FOR BEING A DISRESPECTFUL ELBOW LICKER AND THEN THE ELBOW LICKER'S FATHER HOLDS A PRESS CONFERENCE TO SAY HE WANTS TO SUE THE OLD MAN EVEN THOUGH ITALIAN LAW SAYS THAT HE CAN'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH WHAT HAPPENED TO PEOPLE SETTLING THEIR DIFFERENCES BY BUYING EACH OTHER REALLY THOUGHTFUL GIFTS AND THEN STOMPING ON THEM IN FRONT OF EACH OTHER WHILE SHOUTING LYRICS FROM ALANIS MORISSETTE SONGS ABOUT THAT GUY SHE DATED WHO WAS ON FULL HOUSE!!!!!!!!!!

Near the end of Boca Juniors' 2-1 Copa Libertadores win over Union Espanola on Wednesday, Union Espanola defender Diego Scotti apparently had had enough of Juan Roman Riquelme, so he blatantly swept his legs out from under him. Scotti was quickly shown a red card for the act, which was so flagrant it was almost funny. Riquelme had scored the first goal of the match.

There are certain things you just don't do to someone like Juan Roman Riquelme and this is one of them. Unless, of course, you're Cobra Kai.

This has been the Dirty Tackle of the day: a chronicling of unfortunate events.

The bar for European Championships theme songs was set extraordinarily low with Shaggy's Euro 2008 anthem 'Like a Superstar', which is good news for Poland and their Euro 2012 ditty 'Koko Euro Spoko'.

The Poles were given the right to choose their Euro 2012 song on an X Factor-style TV show on Wednesday night. Pop groups, ska bands and a rapper were beaten by Jarzebina — Polish for rowanberry — an 18-member ensemble of heavyset Polish women in traditional rural dress.

Some Polish football fans have reacted angrily online, suggesting the "kitschy" and "embarrassing" song might have won the competition through some sort of vote sabotage. Even the staunchest of Jarzebina critics, however, will have to admit the chorus is pretty infectious.

Of course, this is merely Poland's official song for the tournament, and has nothing to do with co-hosts Ukraine. The official UEFA Euro 2012 song for the tournament is 'Endless Summer' by "German-American pop sensation" Oceana. You're going to hear a lot of this one in June...

The Pune MIrror for May 4, 2012. (@goonergurl20)

Maharashtra, India's second largest tabloid, came oh-so-close to announcing the winners of La Liga correctly just two whole days after the title was sealed. It has the picture of Real Madrid's squad in there perfectly and, well, Barcelona did win the last three titles in a row. But, it didn't win this season, so the "Barca are La Liga Champs" headline is only wrong if you care about things like "what actually happened."

Maybe this is some kind of defiant statement against Mourinho or just the world's best tease for page 14, but someone should cut out the left side of the page for Sandro Rosell's scrapbook.

Thanks to @ajy_s for the tip!

(Getty)

Roy Hodgson

I've made a huge mistake. ... There really is no way this can possibly go well. ... Why am I just realizing this now? ... Sweet Jiminy -- his hand feels like a moistureless squid. How does that happen? What is going on here? ... Harry Redknapp going to Euro 12 as a BBC pundit can't be good, either. ... He's going to kill me on the first day and then say "Hey, since Roy's got a Wii controller sticking out of his head, I can step in." ... Now Bernstein's hand feels like a crumbly biscuit. ... What the- ... This is going to be the worst...

Jose Mourinho feeling confident. (AP)

Real Madrid celebrated their record 32nd La Liga title at Cibeles a day after beating Athletic Bilbao to seal the title and two weeks after finally beating Barcelona in a league match under Jose Mourinho. Madrid also set a new La Liga record for goals scored in a season (115). Given all that, Mourinho decided to take the opportunity to respond to critics who say his team plays too defensive and describe his style as "anti-football" compared to Barcelona's tiki-taka approach.

Said Mourinho to Portuguese TV station SIC (via Sky Sports):

"My team played some of the best football in history.

"But there are some luminaries who believe that only one type of football exists on earth. But these people only know football through Google. They swallow knowledge, but know nothing."

Boom, roasted.

Could this be the birth of a new subdivision of undesirable football fans? There's the prawn-sandwich brigade, the glory hunters and now...the Googlers.

Arjen Robben injures himself while laughing. (Getty)

Champions League final hosts Bayern Munich are favorites to beat Chelsea at their home ground, but if they do win, their prize money will be going into the pockets of Bundesliga rivals Schalke and Hoffenheim.

UEFA will pay Bayern a €9 million prize if they beat Chelsea, which also happens to be the combined total due in "success" clauses written into last summer's deal to bring goalkeeper Manuel Neuer from Schalke and the previous January's acquisition of Luiz Gustavo from Hoffenheim.

From Eurosport:

Schalke are already due €2 million for Bayern having reached the semi-finals, but they will be due a further €4 million from the Bavarian giants if they lift the trophy in two weeks' time.

And it doesn't stop there. Hoffenheim struck a smaller but otherwise almost identical deal with Bayern after they sold Luiz Gustavo for €17 million euros in January 2011.

Hoffenheim have already picked up a 1 million euro bonus for the Munich side making the semi-finals, and they'll be due another €2