Dirty Tackle

  • Zenit signed Bart Simpson and it was all very weird

    Brooks Peck at Dirty Tackle1 day ago

    The Simpsons have been partnering with football clubs around the world as a part of a still unclear money printing strategy and now it's FC Zenit's turn to join the brand synergy party. But with a twist.

    Since the partnership was unveiled on transfer deadline day, the Russian club announced it as if they were signing Bart Simpson as they would a new player. So they carried this premise out to its fullest, most terrifying possibilities BY HAVING A HUMAN PERSON DRESSED IN A GIANT BART COSTUME GO THROUGH THE PACES OF A NEW SIGNING.

    In the video above, you'll see the giant headed and sickly looking Bart Simpson going through a medical exam, having an awkward one-sided conversation with Andre Villas-Boas (the indignities never end for Andre, do they?), meet his new teammates and then get initiated into the squad by nearly having his big freaky head knocked off.

    Here's how Zenit announced the signing on their official website:

    The oddities of transfer deadline day have no limits.

    Read More

  • The reunion of Shinji Kagawa and Jurgen Klopp was better than The Notebook

    Brooks Peck at Dirty Tackle1 day ago

    Shinji Kagawa has returned to Borussia Dortmund after two long seasons of being imprisoned on Manchester United's bench and the universe is now a better place for it. One look at the incandescent smiles on the faces of Kagawa and Dortmund manager Jurgen Klopp tells you all you need to know about the joy this move has brought. If the sun is shining in your part of the world today, this is why. (If it's not, that's probably your fault.)

    As Kagawa toiled in the background at Man United, falling out of favor with Sir Alex Ferguson, then David Moyes and, finally, Louis van Gaal, the "#FreeShinji" campaign grew in support on social media networks. And when Shinji was finally freed, even Arsenal's Tomas Rosicky celebrated by posting an artistic interpretation on his Instagram account.

    Read More