Zlatan commands Beckham to cut the grass. (Getty)

It didn't take long for David Beckham and Zlatan Ibrahimovic to embrace each other (literally) as PSG teammates, but now Beckham has revealed his first-hand observations on what we all knew about Zlatan's ego.

In an interview with L'Equipe, Beckham shared his thoughts on the towering monument to martial grace that is Zlatan. From Goal.com:

"Everyone has an ego, but his is of a super type. Before I finish here, I will know the player. I have seen him play at many of the biggest clubs in the world, but I have never known him as a teammate. Now, yes," he said. "I have only been at the club three weeks, but I have never met many players in my career who are as professional as Zlatan."

Beckham didn't just talk about Zlatan's superior ego, though. He also reassured France that he is more than just a shirt salesman.

"If I can contribute to the club selling many shirts, no problem, that's good! It's great to see so many people wearing my shirt," Beckham told L'Equipe. "In the past at clubs

The Castelao. (Getty)

As Brazil battles setbacks on the way to completing the 2014 World Cup stadiums that will be used in this summer's Confederations Cup, one of the certainties is that there will special seats reserved for obese fans.

A report in The Sun claims that the seats for obese people will be twice as wide as standard seats and reinforced to support a person who weighs up to 560 lbs. But the style of seats pictured in their story were torn up from the Castelao -- the first of Brazil's World Cup stadiums to have its renovations completed. NBC Sports' Rick Chandler did some investigating though, and it turns out that some form of seats reserved for obese people are an actual thing.

From the Brazilian government's World Cup site:

The twelve 2014 World Cup Arenas are designed to offer the highest comfort and convenience to supporters. Accessibility is an important item for inclusion, also a requirement by the Brazilian government and FIFA. The Castelão in Fortaleza is an example of how football may

How on earth will the fourth fan find his friends when he gets back from the bathroom? (Getty)

In light of the tragic death of a 14-year-old boy who was struck by a flare during Corinthians' Copa Libertadores match with Bolivian side San Jose, CONMEBOL ordered the Brazilian team to play all home games behind closed doors until further notice.

On Wednesday evening, the Copa Libertadores champions were supposed to defend their title against Colombian side Millonarios with no fans at all in their 40,000-capacity Pacaembu stadium.

However, four suporters went to court to challenge the South American football confederation's ruling. At the eleventh hour, they were successful and granted access to see the game. The Bangkok Post reports:

A court ruling granted the four fans access to the Pacaembu arena, where normally at least 20,000 supporters cheer their beloved team.

Gavioes da Fiel, Corinthians' main fan club, told its more than 96,000 members to comply with the Conmebol decision and stay away from the stadium to avoid any trouble.

Outside the stadium, which was sealed off, about

"Eyyyy, I might go to prison one day because of this car!" (Getty)

As part of their sponsorship of Real Madrid, Audi give cars to all the players and hold media days where they are encouraged to race against each other.

It turns out that giving a group of competitive young men powerful sports cars is not a great idea, as Karim Benzema has been caught speeding at 135mph in his Audi RS5 4.2 FSI while racing his teammates.

The incident occurred after Los Blancos' loss to Grenada last month, as players made their way home on the Spanish capital's four-lane M40 motorway. Benzema, Alvaro Arbeloa, Jose Callejon, Sergio Ramos and Michael Essien were all pulled over and breathalysed, after driving significantly above the 70mph speed limit in a fleet of Porsches and Audis leased by the club.

Spanish newspaper El Pais says they all passed the breathalyser tests, while Essien accepted a €200 on-the-spot fine for driving at 105mph. Benzema, meanwhile, earned a court hearing that could earn him a six-month stint in prison.

Since footballers have expensive lawyers

(Nike)

The USSF celebrates its 100th year of existence this year and to mark the occasion, Nike has produced a special kit for both the men's and women's national teams. It's a modernized throwback to the organization's history and it might just be the nicest kit the US has ever had.

Here's a dollop of history from the manufacturer:

Known originally as the United States of America Foot Ball Association, the organization was formed in April 1913. Three years later, the team played its first game against Sweden in Stockholm where they were victorious 3-2. The new kit celebrates the centenary and is inspired by the uniform worn in that game.

Gone is the modern rocketball logo with a strange number of stars and stripes and in its place is an enlarged crest modeled on the giant one worn front and center like a chest plate by the original team. Like the rest of the shirt, it's a bit more understated than most have been. "The crest's 13 stars and 13 stripes replicates the motif of the 1913 kit and symbolizes the first American flag of the original 13 colonies," says Nike.

(Getty)

Before Cristiano Ronaldo opened the scoring in the 13th minute of Real Madrid's 3-1 Copa del Rey second leg win against Barcelona, goalkeeper Jose Pinto attempted to play some mind games. Pinto probably thought it important to get in Ronaldo's head early -- especially since this was the first of two Clasicos in a five-day span (though AS has since reported that Ronaldo won't start this weekend's La Liga match as he rests up for Man United on Tuesday).

Marca has since put out a video (below) showing Pinto talking to Ronaldo as he prepared to take his penalty and the first of Ronaldo's two goals that followed. Here now is a transcript of what Pinto said.

Pinto: Can you do this, Cristiano? I'm all hopped up on Pinto Power. You think you can get one by me?

Ronaldo: Yeah.

Pinto: Wow. OK. Just tell me on thing, Cris. Which one of us has a long ponytail full of braids like a cross between Bo Derek and something out of a boyband in 1998? Huh? Here's a hint: It's not you, hard top. It takes

(Getty)

On Tuesday, reports of Mario Balotelli commissioning a statue of himself sternly flexing quickly blanketed the Internet. But according to Italian paper Corriere della Sera, an email written by Balotelli and sent by his brother, claims the tale of a Mario Balotelli statue to be housed in Mario Balotelli's house is false. Since only every fourth ridiculous Mario Balotelli story is true, we all should have seen this coming.

"I just want to play football," the paper quotes him as saying. "The story of the statue is false." The emailer then goes on to say that he never met the artist interviewed in the original report and never approved the project he detailed.

We've been down this road before. In an interview with Oasis songwriter Noel Gallagher last year, Mario debunked a string of oddball reports about him that the English papers fudged during his time in Manchester. And now it seems the Italian papers are picking up where they left off.

Then again, this is the man who has a camouflage

(Reuters)

It's a classic storybook tale -- a 32-year-old man who has established himself as a modest star in Europe joins the LA Galaxy and after playing for there for a solid year, gets mistaken for an "unidentified fan" at a Lakers game by a major news agency. That man then overcomes no odds to play a leading role in his team's second straight MLS Cup triumph. Then, when David Beckham goes to rule Paris free of charge and Landon Donovan flirts with retirement before settling on an extended sabbatical that drifts him off to Cambodia, that 32-year-old captain of Ireland's national team also becomes captain of LA. This is the stuff that movies pitched at nightclub urinals are made of.

With the new MLS season set to begin this weekend, Galaxy manager Bruce Arena made the announcement that should finally ensure that Robbie Keane's name is known to at least a few more people in Southern California. From Goal.com:

"Robbie Keane will be our captain to start the season, and he will be our captain this season," Arena told reporters during the unveiling of the club's second uniform. "(Keane is) a fabulous choice as captain. He's a quality player, he's a quality leader, so Robbie's prepared to lead this team."

Keane as captain is obviously as much of a no-brainer as Arena makes it sound. He was vice-captain and the league's fourth best scorer in his first full season last year with 16 regular season goals and he added six more goals in as many playoff matches. He's a humble guy -- when asked about the "unidentified fan" thing, the Sporting News' Brian Straus quotes him as saying he “doesn’t give a (expletive)” about it -- and he earned the respect of his teammates perhaps a bit quicker than David Beckham did when he first arrived in Los Angeles.

As for Donovan, he really is in Cambodia right now and it seems he really did lose his shirt along the way...