Dirty Tackle

  • Zenit signed Bart Simpson and it was all very weird

    Brooks Peck at Dirty Tackle17 hrs ago

    The Simpsons have been partnering with football clubs around the world as a part of a still unclear money printing strategy and now it's FC Zenit's turn to join the brand synergy party. But with a twist.

    Since the partnership was unveiled on transfer deadline day, the Russian club announced it as if they were signing Bart Simpson as they would a new player. So they carried this premise out to its fullest, most terrifying possibilities BY HAVING A HUMAN PERSON DRESSED IN A GIANT BART COSTUME GO THROUGH THE PACES OF A NEW SIGNING.

    In the video above, you'll see the giant headed and sickly looking Bart Simpson going through a medical exam, having an awkward one-sided conversation with Andre Villas-Boas (the indignities never end for Andre, do they?), meet his new teammates and then get initiated into the squad by nearly having his big freaky head knocked off.

    Here's how Zenit announced the signing on their official website:

    The oddities of transfer deadline day have no limits.

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  • Chris Kamara can't hear any of his cues, watches match intently

    Brooks Peck at Dirty Tackle2 days ago

    Sky Sports reporter/Brazilian thief catcher Chris Kamara is perhaps best known for thoroughly enjoying the fact that he had no idea who was sent off at Portsmouth four years ago. Well, in his eagerness to make sure that never happens again, Kamara now watches the matches he attends so intently that he's become completely oblivious to his cues.

    Soccer Saturday's Jeff Stelling tried to cue Kamara, who was positioned at Upton Park for West Ham v Southampton, three times and all three times Kamara either couldn't hear him or was too focused on the match to realize that he was on live television.

    He wasn't the only one on the program having difficulties, though. Paul Merson interrupted a discussion earlier on in the show by choking on the spicy sushi he was eating for lunch.

    Believe it or not, there was actually some football going on in the midst of all this madcap hilarity, too.

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