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    Shutdown Corner

    Fake Jon Gruden on Real Jay Gruden being favored to land Jags job

    This guy is frustrated. (Getty)Here's a hot scoop for ya: The Jacksonville Jaguars are looking for a head coach and the task may fall to a member of the Gruden family. But I know what you're thinkin' and, no, it's not this guy! My little brother, Jay, a great coach in his own right, is a leading candidate to take over down in Florida.

    Yeah, that's right. I've got a younger brother and, lemme' tell ya, that guy was the athlete of the family and may even be the best coach! We used to call him the Energizer Bunny because he never stopped goin'! When he was on the football field, he made me look like Jaws on the golf course! (Booming laughter.) Jay was a quarterback at Looelville and he had a pretty good record there before movin' on to the Arena Football League where he was a regular Kurt Warner. Then he became a coach and was more like Pop Warner! You talk about versatile ...

    I had the pleasure of having Jay on my staff for a few years and, I've gotta tell ya', this guy's football mind is sharp as a tack. When I met with him after his birth, that guy was drawing up X's and O's in his crib. He's been the offensive co-ordinator of the Cincinnati Bengals for one year and look where they are now! You'll hear people say, "It's only been one year. Let's wait to see what he can do." Well here's what I have to say to that: I'm not much one for boastin', but you'll remember another assistant that was on my staff, went to another team to be a co-ordinator and then one year later became a head coach in the National Football League. That guy's name? Mike Tomlin. (Laughs) Yeah, you may have heard of him once or twice.

    But lemme' take off my brother hat and put on my football hat. Mike, ya mind if I borrow yours?

    mike tirico hat

    Jay Gruden can flat-out coach. Arena Football League, National Football League, Lingerie Football League, it doesn't matter. Those Jacksonville Jaguars would be getting themselves a fine leader and will be a perennial playoff contender if they make that hire.

    As for me, I'm quite happy in this ESPN booth workin' with professionals like Mike and Jaws. Where else could I rehash my talking points during 16 primetime games in the National Football League, get to talk to guys like Aaron Rodgers and Cam Newton and still be in the booth for the grandness that is the BCS. I signed a five-year contract extension with this great network and have no plans to leave. (Phone rings.) What's that Bob? St. Louis? How much?! This guy's listenin'.

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    17 comments

    • GPR  •  4 months ago
      Chris Chase SUCKS
    • James O  •  St James, New York  •  4 months ago
      Wow, way to try and steal KSK's NFL personality impressions and fail miserably at it. This guy right here, let me tell you, this guy flat-out sucks at trying to be funny, Jaws.
    • rob  •  Bethany, Oklahoma  •  4 months ago
      horrible waste of time reading.this garbage.
    • y  •  Fontana, California  •  4 months ago
      If Spanos wasn't scared of Norv and AJ, one of you could of came to San Diego!!!
    • Justin  •  4 months ago
      Chris Chase articles are terrible, but the comments make up for it.
    • emiller  •  San Francisco, California  •  4 months ago
      chris chase, you have forever changed menow whenever i read an article on this normally good and before you start clapping your hands and jumping up and down in glee i mean Shutdown Corner, i immediately look for the author and subsequently like close the tab. this is the last you'll hear from me(grammar snobs, i know that was a run-on. do you honestly think grammar means #$%$ in something as informal as this?)peace, chris chase (who do you know high up at yahoo that got you this job you so don't deserve?)
    • Crazy Legs  •  4 months ago
      FCC
    • sp  •  4 months ago
      i think he'll do alright
    • dave  •  St Paul, Minnesota  •  4 months ago
      knucklehead
    • Jimmy Jackson  •  Greenville, North Carolina  •  4 months ago
      this article is meaningless and opinion based. I feel dumber after reading! thanks jerk!
    • Jackass  •  San Diego, California  •  4 months ago
      I still hate you Chris. But, you made me laugh here. I think we finally found what you're good at.
    • bucfanlostiniowa  •  4 months ago
      GAY
    • dizzzz  •  4 months ago
      vomit
    • gee cee  •  4 months ago
      is he a good offensive coordinator or a top head coach?? Al Davis made him. He did not do nothing after the one season he inherited a super bowl championship team.
      • GeraldM 4 months ago
        He made a Super Bowl winning team in XXXVII !!!
    • Mad Dog Roy Earle  •  Chesterfield, Missouri  •  4 months ago
      Jon Gruden's a schmuck with diarreah of the mouth. I wish someone would hire him so we don't need to listen to his mindless comments on MNF.
      • MGD4U4ME 4 months ago
        I suppose you'd rather listen to Tony Korn-holer again?
    • Vera M  •  4 months ago
      wow 2 X chargers moving on in the post season, wtg drew and sproles we as chager fans are very proud of you guys, gl the rest of the way!!
    • Mark  •  Alpharetta, Georgia  •  4 months ago
      Gruden to University of LOST !!

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