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FPM Medals: Olympics memorabilia

Fourth-Place Medal

Continuing a magnificent two-day old tradition, FPM celebrates the best and worst of the Beijing Games. Check here for more FPM medals.

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In our quest to find the most awesome and absurd Olympics items, we landed on Ebay to find the products that *really* captured the essence of athletic competition. Between a Michael Phelps-used Speedo, a Dream Team windbreaker, Dream Team air mattress and Shawn Johnson cardboard stand-up, the FPM Medal was pretty much a no-brainer. Let us review the four nominees for good measure:

Shawn Johnson Cardboard Stand-up - Currently for sale with a bid of $76.00 and T minus 20 hours remaining

Michael Phelps Autographed Used Speedo - Sold for $579 the same weekend Phelps captured his 8th gold medal. Perfect timing on the vendor's part and equally disgusting.

Dream Team windbreaker- Sold for $12.99, and will get its true value via wall decor. Anyone who wears the jacket in our current society will likely be mocked and have to answer questions about Reebok Pumps, Zubaz and Philadelphia Eagles fans.

Scottie Pippen/David Robinson Air Mattress- Sold for $7.99 and has a hole in it! Throw on some tape and use as a de facto cardboard stand-up and it will at least muster a shred of long-term benefit.

Safe to say our undisputed FPM Medal for value goes to our smiling gymnast. It turned into a two-horse race between Phelps' swimming attire and 56 inches of cardboard Shawn Johnson. In the end, Johnson's value will stand the test of time (pun not intended). When the Olympics flavor tapers off and autumn officially hits the calendar, the novelty of Michael Phelps will certainly subside. Likewise for Johnson.

The difference in their items, however, is that Johnson will be smiling for all time. The Speedo on display will quickly turn into the "Speedo on the wall" and soon you'll be the creepy person with another man's briefs you treasure as a souvenir. That's what makes a sexual deviant. Plus, nobody wants to spend 580 bucks on a used Speedo.

Most of us, anyway.

Photo via Ebay user rkbakely

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