Advertisement

Jersey Fouls: NHL on Versus, Chelios family fashion follies

Greg Wyshynski

Jersey Fouls is our ongoing exploration of the rules and etiquette for proper hockey jersey creation and exhibition. If you spot what you think may be a foul in your arena, e-mail a photo to us at puckdaddyblog@yahoo.com for inclusion in future installments.

If he's correct, Puck Buddy Chris C. has found what would be an epic, epic FAIL from television coverage of the Detroit Red Wings in the Stanley Cup playoffs:

Now this is INEXCUSEABLE. In their little pre-commercial feature thing, Versus put the spotlight on both goaltenders. They show a picture of Chris Osgood(notes), WITH THE WRONG LETTERING ON HIS JERSEY. Seriously? You're the "national" home for hockey in this country, and you can't even get the goalie to wear his real jersey? Amazing. Everyone at Versus is at fault for this one.

The side-by-side would seem to indicate that Chris is onto something. OK, so it's no Lindstrom jersey. But it's still pretty embarrassing.

(UPDATE: Someone who knows a thing or two about a thing or two about Versus writes in: "They shoot those promos in the pre-season, when the Wings wear jerseys with cheap lettering." Eh ... not really an excuse, to tell you the truth.)

In staying with the Wings for a moment, please recall that much like Spock, Chris Chelios(notes) is of two worlds (and Montreal, but please don't ruin the trendy pop culture reference like that): He is both a Chicago Blackhawks and Detroit Red Wings legend.

As the Detroit Free Press found out, Chelios's mother Susan has a handmade Frankenjersey celebrating her son's time with both clubs.

Both Erica B. and Jordan W. sent over this story, and we're torn: Frankenjerseys have failed in the past, but have also passed for special considerations. So can Chelios's mother or -- say, the mother of the Staal Bros. -- get away with Frankenjerseys out of consideration of their split loyalties?

Or is Mama Cheli's "love the Hawks, root for the Wings" schtick patently unacceptable in the rule of puckhead law?

Coming Up: Sidney Crosby(notes) goes old school, a questionable Winter Classic jersey, the Stanley Cup gets fouled, Martin Brodeur's(notes) babe and a Carolina Hurricanes jersey that pretty much epitomizes what most of Canada thinks of the Carolina Hurricanes.

And here ... we ... go.

From our old pal WizzNutzz intern Jarkko comes this Washington Capitals sweater that would appear to be a celebration of either Baskin Robbins or investigative journalism. Unless, of course, this guy is named Scoops and this is some strange cousin to the Steve Heinz '57' jersey.

Puck Buddies Matthew C. and Jessica E. both sent in this Sidney Crosby old school Pittsburgh Penguins Jersey Foul. Jessica explains:

My boyfriend and I have seen this jersey foul way too many times this season, and every time, we somehow fail to get a good picture of it. Although I hoped to never see it again, he just sent me this picture while he was at the mall. So enjoy this offensive mess.

Sadly, we couldn't get a photo of the genius fan we saw on Saturday night- wearing a #58 Steelers jersey with LETANG on the nameplate. Clearly, this kid's mother didn't raise him right, because I can't imagine anyone in western PA raising a child to believe that it's okay to replace any member of the Steel Curtain's name. Even if he's a defenseman. And especially if he's a HOCKEY player. No offense to Letang, but he's certainly not a hall of famer like (the ever beloved) Jack Lambert.

Damn, that Letang jersey would have been cool.

Anyhoo, this is Jersey Fouls 101 right here: The name goes on the jersey that the player has worn. None of this old school stuff, no matter how ironic you think it is. And yes, that goes for you too, dude in a Kopitar Gretzky-era Kings jersey. Wherever you are.

Jesse B. captured this jersey while watching the Boston Bruins on NESN. "Winzeecup." Sacrebleu! This is offensive in so many ways, not the least bit that it reminds us of Steve Martin's hack attempt at doing Clouseau in the "Pink Panther" remakes.

Now, here's an interesting conundrum regarding the sweater on the left. This a Chicago Blackhawks jersey from the Winter Classic (via Puck Buddy George C.), and as you can see it's adorned with "Wrigley 09" on the back. For nostalgia's sake, we're actually leaning towards "PASS."

But for a point of comparison, here's an example of the traditional Stanley Cup commemorative jerseys (the Anaheim Ducks, via Toby F.) that we always slag on.

Again, we lean towards "PASS" for the Classic one for the simple fact that the jersey was specially created for that event, while your "Cup 97" or some such is a regular 'ole sweater.

But can one be OK while the other is not? Our heads are spinning. Time to reset the scales.

Ah, there it is. FAIL, because no matter how clever the nameplate might be, the wearer had to actually spell out the joke within the numbers in an absurdly lame move.

(Why do they make question marks for jerseys anyway? In case ?uestlove from The Roots takes up hockey?)

Can you believe the image above was sent in by Sarah Spain from Mouthpiece Sports? Is there anything she can't do?

You know, if Reebok really wanted to test how water resistant the new sweaters are, they should have analyzed this one after the last three minutes of Game 7 against the Hurricanes. At least the sleeves, where most of the tears were likely wiped.

Finally ...

Puck Buddy Jason B. sent over this image and writes:

Spotted in "The Eye" (the Hurricanes store). Granted I think it was on a clearance rack and I've never seen anyone wearing one at a game, but a sleeveless jersey just shouldn't exist in the first place. It invites ridicule. I think its for men judging from the size.

Now, we've written about these awful "Enforcer" model jerseys before. But seeing them for the Hurricanes is just ... well ... just a little Larry the Cable Guy, aren't they? Like there should be two tattooed arms emerging from it, one holding a beer cozy with a can of Bud and the other holding a NASCAR flag?

Message to Hurricanes fans: Please don't purchase these jerseys, not matter how hot it gets in Carolina. And if you do, please do not allow a Canadian tourist to photograph you wearing one.