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Greg Wyshynski

Finally, Zamboni drivers will know when it's time for booze

Greg Wyshynski
Puck Daddy

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After we published that hilarious ZUI (Zamboni Under the Influence) story, we heard from a few 'Boni drivers who anonymously copped to similar mind-altering indiscretions behind the wheel and on the ice -- including one former rink resurfacer said he who would puff a little of Grandpa's Magic Eye Medicine before the final ride of the night. Hey, whatever keeps those lines straight.

The What on Earth catalogue has the right gift for the chemically impaired Zamboni driver in your life: The Zamboni Watch, which retails for $74.95. Perfect if you're "one of the millions who loves the hypnotic action of ice being smoothed to glasslike perfection." Or if you're a Zamboni driver who occasionally looks both "hypnotic" and "glasslike."

Kudos to the watchmaker for including the post-lockout trapezoids, and for the ingenious mirroring of the word "Zamboni" in the attacking zones. Really, the only things missing from this realistic craftsmanship are the garish beverage advertisements on the sides and a disadvantaged kid waving to the crowd from the passenger's seat.

H/T to Fashionably Geek. Seventy-five bucks remains a little steep for a novelty watch, or at least one that doesn't have a built-in calculator like the ones we wear. That said, we'd pay double that if someone creates a timekeeping homage to that bleeding Zamboni from the Sharks/Penguins game. Maybe even triple.

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