36. "I can't talk now." - then-Baltimore coach Don Shula, hanging up the phone, when Joe Robbie called to talk about the Dolphins job. A fistfight between two Colts assistant coaches was breaking out on Shula's front lawn and he had to stop it
33. "I couldn't find London on a map if they didn't have the names of the countries. I don't know what nothing is. I know Italy looks like a boot. I know London Fletcher(notes). He's black, so I'm sure he's not from London." - Channing Crowder(notes) on the going to London to play in the 2007 season
22. "With Larry Shannon coming to our football team, by the way, he's probably a step faster than Randy Moss(notes). So he's bigger, he's taller, he's faster. - Jimmy Johnson after passing on Moss in the 1998 draft
10. "We all figured we had it made -- that these tall, beautiful women were going home with us. Then, all of a sudden, one of the fellows stood up, pointed at one of them and yelled, 'She's got a Johnson!' After that, we pretty much tore the place up. The cops were called, and it was a big incident. Apparently the club had signed up a bunch of female impersonators to work the room, but hey, it was 1972. None of us knew what a drag queen was." - Larry Csonka on a party in New Orleans in the days before Super Bowl VI
4. "We lose this game, I'm going to kill you!" - Nick Buoniconti on the sideline to Garo Yepremian in Super Bowl 7 after the kicker threw a botched field goal attempt into the hands of Washington's Mike Bass, who returned it for a touchdown
Poor Larry Csonka. To be fair, if someone put me in a time machine and sent me back to 1972, I would just assume that johnson-hiding technology was very crude at that point in time, and I wouldn't worry much about it. And I guess I would've learned my lesson, just like Larry. My compliments, 1972 female impersonators.
Great list, though. I'm sure that every team in the league could put together highly entertaining lists of quotes, but it's hard to imagine anyone beating this one.
- Larry Csonka
- Don Shula