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MJD

Deep Posts: The Jaunty Unicorn edition

MJD
Shutdown Corner

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New Orleans Saints head coach Sean Payton has an idea for a movie called "The Xbox Kid," about a young boy in New Orleans who can actually control NFL games by playing games (Madenn, I suppose) on his refurbished Xbox. According to Mike Triplett of the Saints Beat blog at the Times-Picayune, it's actually being shopped around Hollywood by the Creative Artists Agency. If this thing gets made before the "Arrested Development" movie, I'm going to lose all faith in mankind.

Michael Vick(notes) is doing nice things for kids at a local church. His minister's a big believer in the reformed Michael Vick.

• Stop me if you heard this before, but the 49ers say they plan to get Vernon Davis more involved in the offense. Sorry, Vernon, but I'm going to wait a bit before I start moving you up my fantasy draft board.

• The Toronto Argonauts of the Canadian League can no longer hide their secret lust for Vince Young(notes). They listed him on their "secret negotiation list," which means ... actually, I have no idea what it means. But it sounds extremely Canadian and secretive, and I'm sure Young is flattered.

Peyton Manning(notes) will be happy to know that former assistant coaches Tom Moore and Howard Mudd will be returning to the team as consultants on Aug. 1.

• Bob Raissman of the New York Daily News writes about how Tiki Barber was once the hottest prospect in television, and now, no one really even notices him.

• Among the slightly familiar names trying out for the UFL: WR Travis Taylor(notes), WR David Boston(notes), TE Jermaine Wiggins(notes), QB Quinn Gray(notes), WR Reche Caldwell(notes), RB LaBrandon Toefield(notes) and WR/DB Bobby Sippio(notes).

• Jeff Fisher's son almost caught a rather large fish.

• Here's a Rodney Harrison(notes) quote via Peter King in today's Monday Morning Quarterback:

"This is football in the National Football League. I hit a guy with my forearm in his throat or his chest area, and they're trying to fine me. It's football! [...] Football now is turning into a soft, pansy sport. This is not volleyball! This is not tennis! This is some of the biggest, fastest, strongest men in the world. I think it's absolutely ridiculous."

Did Rodney Harrison seriously just complain that he's not allowed to forearm a man in the throat? Why would a forearm to the throat ever be necessary on a football field? What does the NFL have to do before it's not a pansy sport, allow throat forearms and defensive backs to carry switchblades?

• With every day that passes, it looks more and more like Julius Peppers(notes) will have to find happiness as a Carolina Panther.

Dan Le Batard had a great article in today's Miami Herald about the retired version of Jimmy Johnson, who sort of hated being a football coach.

• The Miami Dolphins call it the Wildcat. The version that the Cowboys have been practicing is called the Razorback. When I run an NFL team, I'm going to run the same thing and call it The Jaunty Unicorn.

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