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Matt Hinton

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Matt Hinton
Dr. Saturday

I have to admit, the fine upstanding readership of the Knoxville News-Sentinel pleasantly surprises me -- armchair quarterbacks though we may all be, there's really only one plausible answer to the Sentinel's latest poll:

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This moderate display of common sense is a blow to Vol defensive coordinator John Chavis, who's no doubt spent the entire offseason nervously wavering between three bubbles written on the office white board, "Blitz the Quarterback," "Concentrate On the Run," and "Play Pass Protection," as Phil Fulmer looks on sternly -- Which one's it going to be, John? What do we pay you for, anyway? Are we going to blitz the quarterback or concentrate on the run?! Don't give me that "pass protection" bull flop! You've had six months to decide: blitz or concentrate on the run?! ANSWER THE QUESTION, JOHN! Clearly, this was Chavis' last, desperate hope for a coherent strategy against the Bruins, only to be foiled by his own Rocky-Toppin' kin. Now he has to flip a coin, and just hope it comes up better than it did against Cal, Florida and Alabama last year.

Otherwise, that's a striking lack of respect for Bruin quarterbacks there -- zero percent think UT should concern itself with defending against the rumored UCLA passing game. Although, again, considering L.A. may not have any quarterbacks left by Labor Day, a prescient group.

Elsewhere in stupid polling, FOX Sports pointlessly counts down its top ten programs of the last decade, and comes to a rather, shall we say, surprising conclusion:

Boise State's record against BCS conference teams since 1998: 4-12. This would be far more ridiculous if FOX wasn't ranking the teams strictly according to winning percentage, which is a dumb way to rank teams that don't play similar schedules and isn't clear at all to the casual reader -- who presumably then vents and raves at the impudence of ranking a WAC team No. 1 in any regard while omitting two-time BCS champion LSU from the list entirely, and e-mails the list to his friends so they can be outraged and e-mail to their friends, (or post it to their blog!) etc. Yeah, it's dumb, and don't forget to click the banners! The only thing more futile than making a list like this is thinking it doesn't hit its target -- "buzz," i.e. this post you're reading right now -- dead between the eyes.

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