(USA Today Sports Images)

This offseason we will count down various topics from Monday through Friday, bringing you the top five of the important and definitely some not so important issues in college football. It's the Doc Five, every week until we will thankfully have actual games to discuss.

PLAYERS WHO COULD KEEP JOHNNY MANZIEL FROM ANOTHER HEISMAN

NO. 5, JADEVEON CLOWNEY

We'd like to put South Carolina defensive end Jadeveon Clowney higher. He's likely the best player in college football regardless of position. Anyone who really understands football appreciates how good he is, and how he impacts games.

But let's be honest. History says voters are incapable of giving the Heisman Trophy to a purely defensive player.

Charles Woodson would not have won the award without playing some offense and returning punts for Michigan in 1997. We don't think Clowney will be doing either in 2013 (though he did have that catch in the spring game ... ).

The first Heisman Trophy was given out in 1935, and since then there hasn't been one winner who has played exclusively on defense.  It's literally inconceivable that through all those decades, not once was a defensive player the most outstanding in the sport over a season. But not one has ever gotten enough votes to win the Heisman.

It's a shame. So while Clowney is probably the best player in the nation, or at least second to Johnny Manziel, ranking him higher on the list would probably be foolish. He's not going to win the award unless he does something really special this season.

(CharlotteBuckeyes.com)Giovanni Strassini had a pretty good deal going. He'd show up as a guest at functions for a Charlotte-based Ohio State fan group, he'd pose for pictures and sign autographs, and he'd talk about his exploits as an All-American tight end for the Buckeyes in the mid-1970s on Facebook.

The only problem? Well, Ohio State has never heard of Giovanni Strassini.

Of course, that's where the story gets weird.

Strassini (or whoever he is) saw his story start to unravel on a message board thread at BuckeyePlanet.com. The posters on that site easily figured out there was no Strassini who wore No. 89 for the Buckeyes. He wasn't the third basemen for the baseball team in that era either, as he had also claimed. He definitely didn't score an 8-yard touchdown in the 1976 Rose Bowl, one of the more easily verifiable facts to look up. The Buckeyes' only touchdown that day was a 3-yard touchdown run by Pete Johnson.

The Rose Bowl ring Strassini posted on Facebook didn't look exactly like the actual Rose Bowl ring from the season he claimed it was from. And he wasn't drafted by the Cleveland Browns either, blowing up another one of his stories.

Yet somehow, Strassini pulled this scam off for at least a couple years before anyone noticed.

The Jack Hoffman promotional rookie card that was auctioned off to help benefit pediatric cancer research is still waiting to be claimed.

Upper Deck made a handful of promotional cards for the 7-year-old cancer patient, who scored a touchdown during Nebraska’s spring game, in an effort to raise money for Hoffman’s charity, The Team Jack Foundation. Hoffman signed four of them (three in silver and one in gold) and auctioned one of the silver signed cards on ebay.

The auction received a lot of attention and the final bid was $6,100.

Only the man who supposedly made the bid has no plans to pay up, according to Beckett.com.

College football players rapping on the side is not a novel idea, but it’s rare when one of those players has actual rapping talent.

Cornerback Jabrill Peppers of Paramus (N.J.) Catholic High School is the nation’s top cornerback, according to Rivals, but he’s also an aspiring rapper. And unlike former Michigan State signee Jay Harris, who amicably parted from the school to pursue his rapping career, Peppers actually has talent.

(mlive.com)

Derrick Nash seemingly had everything going for him.

The Carrollton High School (Mich.) senior was the state’s top rusher with 1,967 yards and 27 touchdowns and he had a full scholarship to Central Michigan.

But in April all of that changed. Nash started to feel tired and had a high fever. He was rushed to the hospital where he learned news that no one ever wants to hear.

“I went to the emergency room, and that’s when everything broke loose,” Nash told mlive.com. “They did some blood work. My white blood cell count was three times as high as it should be, and my platelet count was three times as low as what it should be.

“It was leukemia."

Nash began chemotherapy on May 6 and while he was worried about his health, he also was worried that his dream of becoming an FBS player would never come true.

“It was my dream come true,” Nash told mlive.com. “Playing Division I football … I never thought I would get the chance, but I was getting the chance. Signing that letter of intent was the greatest moment in my life. It was something I thought would never happen happening.”

(USA Today Sports Images)

Wyoming coach Dave Christensen in March decided to take over the play calling duties in the wake of offensive coordinator Gregg Brandon’s departure to New Mexico State.

In doing so, Christensen assured anyone who was listening that the 2013 Wyoming Cowboys would be the “fastest” team in the country.

We’re not talking 40 times, we’re talking amassing a lot of plays similar to the offense Christensen directed while the offensive coordinator at Missouri.

"We have been a no-huddle offense, but I felt that, in the last few years, our tempo has slowed down drastically," Christensen told SiriusXM College Sports Nation. "It's unacceptable for what I want to do what I have in mind as an offense. We're trying to get back to a tempo that's maybe a little greater than when I was at Missouri."

So some of you chuckled a bit at the “Texas… Football… Is… Back" video last week, and perhaps rightfully so after the Longhorns had a decidedly meh 2012 season.

Well, if you were snickering at that video, you'll have a big laugh at the response video posted by stewade on YouTube.

(@JohnPhillips)After this bit of news, every school that has a BCS crystal ball trophy will be "accidentally" knocking theirs on the ground and calling an auction to sell off the broken pieces.

Last year, Alabama's crystal football for winning the title at the end of the 2011 season was broken. Carleton Tinker, the father of long snapper Carson Tinker, somehow knocked the ball off its stand. It fell to the floor and shattered. No big deal because insurance covered the cost to replace the trophy, which is valued at about $30,000 (keep this number in mind).

We're sure someone at Alabama, once the football was scooped into a dustpan and put into the Crimson Tide's most modestly priced receptacle, thought it would be funny to put the million pieces of broken glass into a bowl and sell it to the highest bidder. Maybe make a few bucks, have a laugh. Because, while it's kind of cool and certainly unique, who would buy such a thing?

And then the shattered trophy sold for a reported $105,000, which is more than three times what the unbroken trophy is worth.

If that's the going rate, the plate I broke on the floor this morning is headed straight to eBay.