I mean, if you are going to be a balloon sculptor — and it is clear, if nothing else, that Brigham Young University student/artist Joel Zae is that (as well as someone whose buddies shoot teddy bears) — then I guess you might as well make a giant balloon sculpture of LeBron James. His Miami Heat did just win the NBA championship, after all, and he was named MVP of the NBA Finals, and he didn't even lose his trophy. All sounds pretty balloon-sculpture-worthy to me.
In the description of his YouTube video, Zae said the sculpture of James took him an entire Saturday to produce and finish. You can tell that he took his time; those sinewy, striated arms, haunting bug eyes and generally monstrous/nightmare-inducing frame really look finely crafted and slaved over. The perfect thing for little Timmy's birthday party, provided you want to send all of the assembled toddlers screaming from the bouncy castle and headed for their moms. Which you probably want to do, because they were pretty loud in that bouncy castle.
Anyway: Sound work, Mr. Zae. You are clearly a master of your craft, and this is a master's work. Your craft is just kind of scary to me.
Also, be honest: You thought the first 30 seconds was just the headband too, right?
Also-also, at long last, we finally have official confirmation of what scientists have long speculated — that the only fuel turbo-charged enough to propel our frail, meager human body to the heights of LeBron James balloon sculpturedom is a Little Ceasars Hot-N-Ready pizza:
Chalk up another win for American science, y'all!
- LeBron James
- Brigham Young University