Not "stop yelling" or "shave the high school-level goatee" or "watch your minutes so you can lead the C's back to the finals for the third time in four years" or "maybe yell at a few more American-born players for once so that people don't think you're a frothing xenophobe."
Naw. "Be sweet."
This is why Joakim Noah is my favorite player. Occupying a spot once held by, you guessed it, Kevin Garnett.
Noah was on ESPN's "The Waddle and Silvy Show" Wednesday, and I'm kind of ticked I didn't hear this as it went down, because I was driving with Noah on and attempting to listen, but had to switch over to NPR partially because I'm a sucker for smooth, demeaning voices, but mostly because the Dodge Stratus' reception wasn't great. Here's what I missed:
"Kevin Garnett will not -- will not -- get a Christmas gift from me," Noah said with a tinge of humor Wednesday on "The Waddle & Silvy Show" on ESPN 1000. "I don't like him." [...]
"I had his poster in my room," Noah said. "I used to wear his jersey. And the truth is my rookie year, I was in admiration of this guy, and he kind of shut me down.
"And he was very mean to me my rookie year. And he's only mean to the young guys and the [European players], for some reason. I don't know why, but that's who he doesn't like. He's not nice. I talk a lot of trash out there, but c'mon, be a little sensitive. Be sweet."
So many wonderful things. Like the idea that, on Nov. 10, Joakim Noah is already considering his Christmas list, and who has been naughty and nice. I got married over three months ago, and we haven't even finished sending out thank you cards yet. This guy has his Rolodex ready to fire off season's greetings just a few weeks after Canadian Thanksgiving.
Secondly, Kevin Garnett is under no obligation to act like anything more than a [jerk] to a rookie as he gears up for a game during what turned out to be a championship season for the Celtics.
Third, "I talk a lot of trash out there, but c'mon, be a little sensitive. Be sweet."
If the Bulls don't put together a fake commercial for Joakim Noah's School of Sensitive and Sweet Trash Talk by the All-Star break, then they are letting everyone down.
(Yes, I know TBJ has the same post running with the same picture, but apparently Trey and I were working on the same exact post at the same time, and I can't not use this picture, right?)