Anybody who knows ANYTHING about love knows that the best, most romantic, most personal and least obtrusive way to ask for your partner's hand in marriage is to do so publicly at a sporting event. Unfortunately, the practice has become so commonplace that significant others are constantly on the lookout for prospective proposals at athletic competitions — gone are the days where you could just pay to have the Jumbotron ask for you, pose as a giant bird to gain secret court access, call up your old pal Magic Johnson to do the honors or — yaaaaaaaaaaaaaawn — fake your own death to sideline suspicion that you're going to pop the question. These days, you've got to take a page out of Pop's playbook and use a little advanced misdirection to get the job done.
So we salute you, Gentleman at Monday Night's Game Between the Orlando Magic and Miami Heat, for running a well-designed decoy action — working with the Amway Center's game operations staff to have your lady love "randomly" chosen to participate in a half-court shot challenge, then sneaking down to the floor to bend a knee as a consolation prize after she missed:
Real talk, though: It's pretty lucky for him that she didn't make it. If she'd miraculously drained the 47-footer, then found out she wasn't getting like $20,000 but instead had been tricked into participating in a love experiment for the benefit of A) an eventual story and B) people like me, I suspect the proposal wouldn't have been quite so successful.
But she didn't make it, and she did say yes, so true love conquers all and all's well that ends well. The only bummer here is that Magic big man Glen Davis is injured and wasn't on the Orlando bench. If you think "Big Baby" wouldn't have brought the LeBron/Durant "tackle a happy fan to the floor" thing to a whole new level, you're insane, my friend.
If the clip above isn't working for you, you can check out the proposal elsewhere, thanks to NBAshowtimeHD.