Pfffft. I'm not buying it, Tracy McGrady(notes). You keep going around and telling everybody that you have exploding head syndrome, but I literally saw you drinking a 64-ounce Snow Fruit Slurpee during the last timeout, so that excuse ain't about to fly with me.
Sure, we all love massive drinks bursting with "generous helpings of lemon-lime, grapefruit and delicious, delicious snow." Obviously, that sounds fantastic. But chug-a-lugging one and suffering the subsequent brain freeze during an NBA game? Not cool, bro. Yes, I know how that sounds. I was being ironical, Tracy.
Best caption wins some Advil and a glass of warm water. Good luck.
In our last adventure: Shaq and Penny hop aboard the Smile Train.
Runner-up, jlpamc: Penny: "Hi, Shaq."
Shaq: "Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? Thou art more lovely and more temperate: Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May, And summer's lease hath all too short a date."
Second runner-up, Fighting Maroon: Shaq: "After all these years, you're still dissing my free throws? You know I make them when they count. I wish I could say the same for ..."
Together: "NICK ANDERSON!!!"
Penny: "Hahaha!!! ... Ahaha! ... Aha ..." (cries)