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Ball Don't Lie

Create-a-Caption: Dwight Howard’s powers are returning, y’all

Dan Devine
Ball Don't Lie

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That's telekinesis, Kyle. (Gary A. Vasquez-USA TODAY Sports)

After a super successful trip back to Orlando, consecutive wins following Kobe Bryant's severe ankle sprain, 14 straight games with at least 12 rebounds and a clear defensive resurgence that's helped pace the Los Angeles Lakers' 11-3 post-All-Star-break run, it seems evident that Dwight Howard — now just about 11 months clear of surgery to repair a herniated disk in his lower back — is closer to being the sort of healthy difference-maker in the middle that the L.A. brass believed they'd imported this summer. One might say he's looking more like Superman now than he has since heading west, after appearing much more like Clark Kent through the first few months of the season.

And apparently, Dwight's comeback has him cast as the John Byrne version of Superman, who can move objects touched by his "aura" through the sheer force of his will. (Which, y'know, ugh. Like Superman's powers weren't OK enough without adding "self-telekinesis" as an explanation.)

Either that or Dwight's superpowers are less Kal-El and more "Chronicle" ... in which case, the Lakers really could be trouble come the playoffs. Like, a "global catastrophe"-level problem. Yipes.

Best caption wins a game where you try to make free throws as Superman. (Sounds pretty relevant to Dwight's interests.) Good luck.

In our last adventure: Speaking of comic stuff, Ivan Johnson looks kind of like a Rob Liefeld character.

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Loud, quiet and (eventually) loud. Like a Pixies song. (Kevin C. Cox/Getty Images)

Winner, Vaffanculo: "SERENITY NOW!!! SERENITY NOW!!!"

Runner-up, Mark M: Ivan Johnson, seconds before he is elbowed to the head by the man on the right.

Second runner-up, The Devil: Metta World Peace: "Why you laughin'?"

Johnson: "One of your fans just said you were going to the finals."

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League type:
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League size:
10 players
Draft time:
Sep 5 9:00 am
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