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Ball Don't Lie

Chris Bosh is now calling himself “Random Guy”

Eric Freeman
Ball Don't Lie

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Chris Bosh hangs with some other random guys (Chelsea Lauren/ Getty).

In 2010, when the Miami Heat introduced LeBron James and Chris Bosh alongside Dwyane Wade with the pomp of a political convention and/or planetarium laser show, it was popular to call the group a Big Three set of stars. In their two seasons together, though, a hierarchy has developed, with James standing as clearly the best of the bunch and Wade becoming a secondary (yet still super) star. Bosh, however, has become something very different from what he was in Toronto: a very important player to everything the Heat do, but not the sort of player who controls the ball or needs a certain number of shots. He's more like an All-Star who just happens to be a role player.

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Bosh seems to have accepted this role, because he's able to gain fame while also doing pretty cool things like winning championships and hanging out with second-tier recording artists. At Heat Media Day, Bosh even unveiled a new nickname to reflect his new reality. From Joseph Goodman for Heat Check (via SLAM):

Bosh is calling himself the team's "Random Guy" based on the fact that he scores his points from random places.

"I'm still getting used to the offense," Bosh said. "I always watching film to see what I should have done and what I could have done. What I can do better. Where my shots can from. Because I'm the random guy. I don't get any plays called for me, but the public will never know that."

I am always suspicious of people who give themselves their own nicknames — it's forcing a personality when ideally they develop naturally. This one seems to fit, though, particularly when you consider the possible superhero tie-ins. Can't you just imagine the Heat video board showing Bosh in a totally nondescript costume (muted grey and taupe makes for a not-at-all striking color scheme) while lecturing the crowd on important principles like not making a fuss and blending in with the crowd? That's as inspiring as anything I've ever heard.

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In the past, Bosh has been known as "CB4," which worked decently until he moved to Miami and switcher his jersey to No. 1, and various imprecise monikers like "The Guy Who Kind of Looks Like a Lizard." Against those competitors, "Random Guy" sure does stand out.

Really, as long as we're giving out nicknames based on on-court roles, we might as well start calling Mario Chalmers "The Whipping Boy." Has anyone in NBA history been yelled at more regularly?

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