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Ball Don't Lie

C-a-C: ‘Hmm … you pose an interesting question, Ted Turner’

Dan Devine
Ball Don't Lie

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"I suppose I would have to say that I have a difficult time believing that a donkey and an ogre could become such good friends in real life, because while studies suggest that several types of animals display the capacity for friendship as humans understand it, donkeys have not yet been counted among that number, and also, ogres do not exist. But I am glad you are enjoying the film series that I have recommended to you, Ted Turner, and I am glad that we possess the capacity for friendship."

That's a very good answer, Dikembe Mutombo. It's especially impressive to come up with it on the fly in front of cameras when the United Nations Foundation is about to announce partnerships with Disney's "The Lion King" and the Nederlander Organization in its Nothing But Nets effort to combat malaria in Africa, an effort that we can all agree is a great thing. So, two great things came of this meeting. We should all feel good about that.

Best caption wins Ted Turner riding a stuffed buffalo and berating Conan O'Brien, an event that today celebrates its one-year anniversary. Good luck.

In our last adventure: I gave you an old-fashioned Billy Hunter Rorschach test. There is no right; there is no wrong. But what you think Billy Hunter is listening to will tell us something about your mindset.

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Winner, Joshua B: "Hmm, shuffle it is. 'Under Pressure' ... no, next ... 'Ain't Got No Money,' no ... shoot, next ... 'Break Even,' what is this?! All right, forget it, songs from musicals it is. What the ... 'We're Not Gonna Take It?' NOOOOOOOO!!!!!"

Runner-up, Da Dinininon: "Cash rules everything around me / C.R.E.A.M., get the money / Dolla, dolla bill, y'all ..."

Second runner-up, Dago: Recorded Billy Hunter voice: "You are doing a good job, Billy, a very good job. You are doing a good job, Billy, a very good job. You are doing a good job, Billy, a very ..."

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