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That’s So Valdy — Jordany Valdespin quits Dominican team after being pinch-hit for

Mike Oz
Big League Stew

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(Getty Images)

It sounds like Jordany Valdespin, the punchline of a baseball player, is up to his old facepalm-worthy antics. "New year, new me" must not have been one of his 2014 resolutions, considering he had another meltdown. This time in the Dominican Winter League.

Here's MLB Nation with details of the ex-New York Met's latest spat with authority:

Infielder Jordany Valdespin has decided to leave his team, Tigres del Licey, of the Dominican Winter League, reportedly infuriated after being pinch-hit for in a playoff game this past weekend. The news was first reported by Dominican radio show Grandes En Los Deportes (Spanish Twitter link), co-hosted by ESPN Deportes’ Enrique Rojas.

Valdespin hit only .167/.316/.612 in 108 regular season at bats for the Tigres del Licey, accumulating 7 extra-bases (3 homers, 3 doubles, one triple), although with zero stolen bases, which comes a little bit as a surprise given that speed has been the most talked-about skill of his.

Valdespin showing the same maturity as a 10-year-old Little Leaguer, no surprise there. Valdespin — who recently signed a minor-league contact with the Miami Marlins — had what might the most ridiculous baseball season ever in 2013. Let's recap, shall we?

• He was suspended for PEDs in August as part of the Biogenesis scandal and was eventually non-tendered by the Mets.

• Valdespin called Mets manager Terry Collins an "[expletive] sucker" when he was demoted to Triple-A midseason. He was hitting .188 at the time.

• In Triple-A, he was one of the instigators in a benches-clearing brawl that started after he showboated a home run.

• Another home-run showboating affair — with the Mets in May — led to him getting hit by a pitch the next game. Valdespin had asked not to pinch-hit, because he knew retaliation was coming. After the game, he threw a tantrum in the clubhouse because he didn't get his way.

• Valdespin's unfortunate year started when he was plunked in his private parts by a Justin Verlander fastball in spring training. He wasn't wearing a cup and got mocked by the NY tabloids with a "Numbnuts" headline. Fittingly, that might describe the entire previous year of his life.

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(AP)

Do you ever wonder if Jordany Valdespin is a piece of sports theater? A character in a real-life "Eastbound & Down"-esque show meant to troll us all? It's getting harder and harder to believe — with each of his sad antics — that Valdespin believes himself to be an actual professional baseball player.

Enjoy him, Marlins.

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Mike Oz is an editor for Big League Stew on Yahoo Sports. Have a tip? Email him at mikeozstew@yahoo.com or follow him on Twitter!

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