Derek Jeter turned 40 years old on Thursday, giving the people of the baseball-loving Internets yet another reason to celebrate the captain of the New York Yankees. It's his final season, as you know, so he's already getting flooded with adoration every game he plays.
Now he gets a birthday too? Some guys have all the luck.
The Stew wondered, what do you get for the guy who has everything? And not in the cliché way we say about dads who have a lot of ties and good golf clubs — Jeter absolutely lives the good life. He's rich, good-looking, has dated a long list of other guys' dream girls. He plays for the most famous team in baseball and he's a sure-thing Hall of Famer. Beyond all that stuff, the guy is getting gifts from other baseball teams this season every time he visits a new city.
At first, we thought Jeter already has too much stuff, but that inspired another question: Knowing everything Jeter has, what would you give him? Our first thought was simple — a 5-for-5 day at the plate when he returns to action Friday (the Yankees are off Thursday). That would push Jeter's average up to .281 instead of the .268 that it's at now. Much more respectable for a legend's final season, don't you think?
Then we figured we'd ask Twitter, because as you know, when you ask a question on Twitter, sometimes you get amusing answers. So, folks, what would you give Derek Jeter for his birthday?
Here, just to get the obvious one out of the way.
That's some good trolling. We like it.
A rocking chair made of leadership. RT @bigleaguestew Jeter's 40th birthday. What would you give the man who seemingly has everything?— Joe DeLessio (@joedelessio) June 26, 2014
It's funny because of this.
Can Minka Kelly be on it?
"On the 12th day of Jeter, A-Rod gave to me ..."
"Mr. Jeter, here's an extra $25 million from the Steinbrenner family on occasion of your 40th birthday."
"Thank you, Boggs [in this scenario, Jeter has a butler named Boggs]. Please prepare my wealth cave for a Scrooge McDuck dive."
Unless, of course, you think they don't have matching centaur paintings already.
Herpes (again) RT @bigleaguestew: It's Derek Jeter's 40th birthday. What would you give the man who seemingly has everything?— @poser47 (@poser47) June 26, 2014
@bigleaguestew "Here is my offer: nothing" - Michael Corleono— Daniel Stern (@Daniel_Stern) June 26, 2014
Michael Corleone, outed as an Oakland A's fan.
We're pretty sure this is what Derek Jeter thinks of our gift ideas.
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