Phillies at Yankees, 7:05 ET It's a new Stadium, but thanks to the first round of interleague action, bleeping Phillies slugger Chase Utley(notes) (right, in the Bono costume) returns to the borough (though not necessarily the fan base) that booed him during the Home Run Derby a season ago.
As we all know, the homer derby has continued across the street, with the new park setting long-ball records seemingly every day, and that has Utley pumped to check out the new jet stream across the street. He already has 11 homers this season and could give Yankees fans a few reasons to boo him.
"It's a new, expensive ballpark," Utley said. "It's a great place to hit, so I'm excited to get started there."
Clarification: It's a bleeping expensive ballpark that also is a bleeping great place to hit.
The Yankees have won nine in a row and the Phillies are hot, too, having gone 6-1 on their current road trip. It's up to Brett Myers(notes) and A.J. Burnett(notes) — who is looking for his first home win — to keep the respective home run leaders from each league in the park. Best of luck, right-handers!Mets at Red Sox, 7:10 ET They're very forgiving at Fenway, and Shea is gone forever, so there's no more hope of Mookie Wilson ever hitting the ceremonial first grounder through Bill Buckner's legs when these teams meet. We'll just have to settle for new drama, and there's plenty with Daisuke Matsuzaka(notes) making his first start in five weeks and the Mets liable to make very frequent and very funny mistakes. Johan Santana(notes), while he's pitching great this season as usual, has never taken to the Fens; he's 1-3 with a 6.89 ERA there.
Angels at Dodgers, 10:10 ET The Battle of Los Angeles! Hopefully they play Rage's "Guerilla Radio" during batting practice. They ought to. The revolution will be televised, by the way, and it will be called by Vin Scully. The Dodgers are 20-43 in interleague play since 2005 — worst record in MLB — but have a chance to improve that by one victory with the Koufaxish Clayton Kershaw(notes) on the bump.
D-backs at Athletics, 10:05 ET Some interleague match-ups are fun, some are "meh" and some have absolutely no redeeming qualities whatsoever. This, probably, is one of the latter. Who cares what happens when these teams meet? Neither is very good. It's hard to care when either plays a division opponent. The only hope for interest here is a chance photo-op meeting of rookie Clay Zavada(notes), who sports a handlebar mustache, and A's legend Rollie Fingers, who rocked the mother of all handlebars back in the day. You know it won't happen. But what if it did ?
Do you want to learn more? Yahoo! Sports' own Gordon Edes explores how this round of interleague play is almost, but not quite, really cool.
Remember: Hey, Stewies. 'Duk and I and the whole gang down at the office want to wish all of you a very serene Memorial Day. Celebrate reverently and sensibly, and we'll most likely meet back here Tuesday morning with the Juice — unless something epic happens, and we'll break in with a post. And you know we will, seeing as I just jinxed it.