Break out your Clue detective skills, folks., because it looks like Team USA has a stone-cold whodunnit on its hands!
According to our own Gordon Edes, someone entered the national team's locker room at Steinbrenner Field on Tuesday while the U.S. was facing the Yankees in an exhibition and made off with Billy Ripken's valuables.
Reports Mr. Edes:
"Ripken, a coach on Davey Johnson's staff, reported that $400 and a credit card were stolen from his wallet during the game, according to Team USA publicist Rob Butcher. The wallet of Mel Stottlemyre, who is serving as bullpen coach, also was taken from his locker, according to Butcher, but was later recovered in another part of the clubhouse, its contacts intact.
"No baseball articles were taken, Butcher said, and the thief evidently did not venture into the players' area, where presumably the pickings among such stars as Derek Jeter, Jimmy Rollins and Chipper Jones would have been more rewarding."
Said Ripken: "Whoever did this is a "#!*%#!*"
OK, he didn't really say that. And to deplete the other easy and lame jokes from you commenters, Ruben Rivera had absolutely nothing to do with this, as he's currently playing for Team Panama. Neither did Brian CASHman.
More as this story develops ...