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Shocker Special: Brian Griese would humiliate Jeff Garcia in a game of darts

Roto Arcade

Each week the Noise will guide desperate, deep-thinking owners into the dark corners of the waiver wire to mine a last-minute diamond. Turn on your helmet light and pack a pickaxe. We're digging for drop-jaw surprises owned in less than 10 percent or started in less than five percent of Yahoo! leagues.

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Whenever Brian Griese stands in front of the locker room urinal, he always hits the bull's eye.

Known for his remarkable accuracy, the Crisco of quarterbacks is poised to accumulate appreciable fantasy returns against the Falcons, much to Jeff Garcia's chagrin. Luckily for the Sam Cassell of the NFL his busty wife is still insanely attractive.

Air execution in Jon Gruden's West Coast scheme is dependent on delievering crisp passes. Given Griese's pinpoint release and heady decision making, he has an excellent opportunity to thrive versus a very young Atlanta coverage duo (Chris Houston and Brent Grimes) that surrendered a 72.7 completion percentage, 262 yards and two touchdowns to Jon Kitna Week 1. Remember, in six starts with the Bears last season, Griese racked a respectable 251.3 yards and 1.5 touchdowns per game.

Dirty Birds safety Erik Coleman seems intimidated by Griese's exaggerated greatness. Per the Atlanta Journal-Constitution:

"Griese is a very intelligent quarterback. He's going to get rid of the ball. He's going to make the right read and he's going to put the receivers in position to make plays. It's definitely a tough assignment."

A strong performance from Griese Sunday may drop serial quarterback dater, Gruden, down on bended knee. With speedsters Joey Galloway and Antonio Bryant presumably at full-strength, the scowl-faced coach should be prepared to pop the question.

Obviously we set the bar insurmountably high with our Hank Baskett call last week, but lightning sometimes does strike twice.

If you're a Matt Schaub (Ike'd) owner scurrying for a replacement or a Carson Palmer (vs. Ten)/Marc Bulger (vs. NYG) backer overly concerned with your QB's matchup, the eight percent owned (one percent started) Buccs slinger might be the swashbuckler you're searching for.

Fearless Forecast: 22-32, 243 passing yards, 2 touchdowns, 1 interception

Post your Week 2 Shocker Special with projection in the comments section below.

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Image courtesy of US Presswire

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