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Lames: Matty Ice’s frigid ways to continue in Carolina

Brad Evans
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Matt Ryan has been the king of inconsistency of late. (USP)

Each week the Noise highlights 10 bold names who he believes are destined to torpedo your team leave egg on his face. For those playing the Lames home edition, each player must be started in at least 50 percent of Yahoo! leagues to qualify. As an accountability advocate, results, whether genius or moronic, will post the following week using the scoring system shown here. If you're a member of TEAM HUEVOS, post your Week 14 Lames in the comments section below.

Matt Ryan, Atl, QB (86-percent started)
Matchup: at Car
Over the past five weeks, Ryan's fantasy value has hung in a meat locker. Chilled by three sub-20 point efforts in five games, the once fiery commodity has cooled significantly. His inexplicable 165-1-0 line against New Orleans, the league's friendliest pass defense, was dumbfounding. Just three weeks prior he burned the division rival for 411 yards and three touchdowns. Maddening. With a pair of explosive wide receivers (Roddy White and Julio Jones), a future Hall of Fame tight end (Tony Gonzalez) and questionable rushing attack, weekly expectations for Ryan are understandably high. He should throw for 300-2 every time he steps on the field. In a virtual game where values can swing in the blink of an eye, what's happened to the passer isn't unfounded. Just look at the rapid ascension of Russell Wilson. In Fantasyland, surprises, good or bad, lurk behind every corner. Ryan was spectacular in his first meeting with Carolina back in Week 4, tallying 369 yards and three touchdowns. However, the Panthers have surrendered the fifth-fewest passing touchdowns and fifth-fewest 20-plus yard pass plays this season. Since Ryan's 30-point scoregasm, only Josh Freeman in Week 11 has surpassed 20 points in a game against the new Hello Kitties. And that's against the likes of RGIII (16.1 fpts), Peyton Manning (19.5) and Tony Romo (16.5). If you have a strong crutch, ground the Falcon.

Fearless Forecast: 22-35, 258 passing yards, 1 touchdown, 1 interception, 4 rushing yards, 16.3 fantasy points

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Frank Gore, SF, RB (91-percent started)
Matchup: vs. Mia
Written off by many, including yours truly, during draft season, the grizzled veteran hasn't taken the backward step that was predicted. Running behind an offensive line capable of opening holes wide enough for a blue whale, Gore has averaged a sensational 4.9 yards per carry and is just 30 yards shy of 1,000 yards on the year. His subsequent 12.9 points per game average in standard formats checks in at No. 9 at his position. Despite his studly appearance, the golden commodity could be fantasy pyrite in Week 14. Against straight-line rushers with similar skills as Gore, Miami has held its own. Marshawn Lynch, BenJarvus Green-Ellis and Steven Jackson each failed to register a 10-point fantasy day against the 'Fins. Suffice it to say, no matter how terrific the run-blocking, most offenses tally numerous three yard gains against Cameron Wake and company. RBs have averaged just 3.6 yards per carry against them this year. Throw in Colin Kaepernick's poaching ways, and Gore 'The Snore' is slated to make a cameo in Week 14.

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Fearless Forecast: 18 carries, 65 rushing yards, 2 receptions, 14 receiving yards, 0 touchdowns, 9.4 fantasy points

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Ray Rice, Bal, RB (97-percent started)
Matchup: at Wash
It's becoming increasingly obvious, Ravens offensive coordinator Cam Cameron would struggle scoring points on Tecmo Super Bowl. The man is a buffoon. His incredible misappropriation of Baltimore's best offensive weapon against Pittsburgh last week cannot be overstated. Rice, once of the game's best closers, failed to record a single carry in the fourth quarter of a hotly contested game, a shocking result the rusher chocked up to 'situational football.' Overall, he registered just 13 touches. Utterly moronic. Historically, after Cameron brain-farts, Rice is usually gifted 20-plus touches the following week. This season, Weeks 9 and 11 are prime examples. But even if presented a hefty workload, the multi-time Pro Bowler may not churn out a star-worthy line. Similar to Tampa, Washington sells out the pass to contain the run. On the year, only Jonathan Dwyer and Ahmad Bradshaw have reached 85 yards on the ground against it. In total, the 'Skins have allowed the sixth-fewest fantasy points to RBs. Because of Rice's dynamite versatility, his PPR contributions will again be useful, but for those in standard formats a playoff letdown is in the forecast.

Fearless Forecast: 18 carries, 61 rushing yards, 5 receptions, 23 receiving yards, 0 touchdowns, 12.1 fantasy points

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Cecil Shorts, Jax, WR (53-percent started)
Matchup: vs. NYJ
Undeniably one of the most underrated producers over the past several weeks, Shorts has blossomed into a legitimate WR1 even in shallow formats. The apple of Chad Henne's eye is one the league's brightest young play-makers. Several times he's converted an 8-yard shallow cross into an explosive gain, using his blazing open-field speed to capitalize on defensive mismatches. Over the past five weeks, he's hung with the position's greatest heavyweights ranking No. 7 in standard league per game average (12.9), one spot behind Demaryius Thomas. More remarkable, he's scored at least 13.7 fan points in four straight. Unfortunately, all good things eventually come to an end. And in the case of the spirited wideout, a date with Antonio Cromartie could lead his owners to their playoff demise. On a team full of punchlines, the Jets corner is the only person that shouldn't be taken lightly. His assignments have caught just 42.2 percent of targeted passes and he's surrendered a laudable 61.5 QB rating. Shorts must past post-concussion tests this week to ensure availability, but if cleared, the Jag has a tall task ahead.

Fearless Forecast: 4 receptions, 50 receiving yards, 0 touchdowns, 8.0 fantasy points

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Denarius Moore, Oak, WR (50-percent started)
Matchup: vs. Den
Only four weeks ago, many 12-team owners would've described Moore as a reliable WR2. From Weeks 3-10, he compiled a 8.6-4.4-72.6 per game output and crossed the chalk five times. Because of Oakland's overly generous defense and Carson Palmer's flourishing nature, especially in garbage time, it seemed he would be a starting lineup staple for the remainder of the season. Oh how quickly times change. Since Week 10, he's grabbed a mere four receptions for 60 yards and a score. More troubling, he was benched in favor of rookie Rod Streater late last week against Cleveland. Post-game, Raiders head honcho cited 'drops' as the reason for the hook. Though Moore is expected to start Thursday, he shouldn't for supporters hoping to survive and advance. Despite his old age, Champ Bailey continues to execute at a high level. He and tag-team partner Chris Harris have yielded a 71.3 QB rating. Considering Moore's soft-ground standing and tough one-on-one matchup, a Denarius disaster could be in the offing. Weigh alternatives.

Fearless Forecast: 3 receptions, 32 receiving yards, 0 touchdowns, 5.4 fantasy points

BONUS WEEK 14 LAMES

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TEAM HUEVOS PICKS OF THE WEEK

Each week one fortunate guest prognosticator will have a chance to silence the Noise. Following the rules stated above, participants are asked to submit their "Lames" (1 QB, 2 RBs, 2 WRs, 1 TE, 1 D/ST) by midnight PT Tuesdays via Twitter @YahooNoise. How large are your stones?

Reader Record: 43-50, 46.2%

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