Each week the Noise highlights 10 bold names who he believes are destined to torpedo your team leave egg on his face. For those playing the Lames home edition, each player must be started in at least 50 percent of Yahoo! leagues to qualify. As an accountability advocate, results, whether genius or moronic, will post the following week using the scoring system shown here. If you're a member of TEAM HUEVOS, post your Week 16 Lames in the comments section below.
Matthew Stafford, Det, QB (74-percent started)
Matchup: vs. Atl
What Stafford hasn't achieved this year is quite remarkable. Though he's only 62 passes shy of breaking Drew Bledsoe's single-season attempts record, he's tallied the same number of vertical scores as Jay Cutler (17) and one fewer than Sam Bradford. Plain bad luck is partially to blame for the shocking lack of TDs. Calvin Johnson has seemingly fallen short of the goal-line a half-dozen times. Injuries to Nate Burleson and Ryan Broyles coupled with Titus Young's temper tantrum didn't help, but the former No. 1 pick is far absolved from the production downturn. Poor decision-making and flawed mechanics have led to numerous misfires and turnovers inside the red-zone. Many receivers have been open near the end-zone, Stafford has, too often, missed them badly. Another rocky performance should be expected this week against Atlanta. Only Seattle has yielded fewer passing touchdowns than the Falcons this season (13). Since Week 5, Drew Brees and Cam Newton are the only signal callers to log multiple scores versus Asante Samuel and company. He'll be a quality bargain buy in drafts next year, but with greenbacks on the line, Stafford will lead you to bankruptcy if trusted.
Fearless Forecast: 26-47, 303 passing yards, 1 passing touchdown, 3 interceptions, 7 rushing yards, 16.8 fantasy points
Matchup: at GB
Filled with more plot twists than a Tarantino bloodbath, Johnson's season has taken owners on quite the ride. His highs have been nothing short of spectacular. His lows, however, have left many deeply sullen. On paper, Green Bay would appear to be an ideal matchup. Since Week 10 only the Cardinals and Giants have surrendered more fantasy points to rushers. But Clay Matthews' return to action in Chicago last week greatly bolstered a unit in dire need. Matt Forte was effective in the pass game, but struggled to find creases between the tackles, finishing with a meager 69 yards on 20 carries. Chicago's offensive line is mostly to blame, but Matthews is a difference-maker. When he was on the field in Green Bay's first nine games, Frank Gore was the only rusher to surpass 100 rushing yards against the Pack. During that stretch, RB1s netted a marginal 4.0 yards per carry. Complicating matters, Tennessee's inadequacies on defense could place the Titans in a deep hole, curtailing Johnson's scoring opportunities. No doubt he looked great (On one run) against the Jets Monday night, but don't be surprised if his CJ2Lame alter-ego rears its ugly head at Lambeau.
Matchup: at Mia
When 'Spiller' is mentioned in the presence of fanalysts, most instantly disrobe. His ankle-breaking moves, drag racer wheels and dynamite versatility has him high on 'sexiest' lists. The admiration is warranted. He's averaged a gaudy 7.1 yards per touch, tallying an insane 1,399 total yards on only 199 touches. Imagine for a minute what he could do with Arian Foster's workload. As great as Spiller is, a lackluster line could be on tap on South Beach. The Dolphins are one of the few defenses that made the explosive rusher work for his yards. Week 11 in Buffalo, he compiled a modest 4.1 yards per carry against them. Cameron Wake, who has accounted for 33 stops, tops among defensive ends, is one of the league's finest run defenders. He along with linebacker Kevin Burnett and defensive tackle Randy Starks explain why the 'Fins are quite formidable in the trenches. Spiller and Chris Johnson are the only two RBs that have eclipsed 100 total yards against them. Minus Fred Jackson, C.J. will get another 15-20 touches, but in the rematch, count on the home team to get the best of him.
Fearless Forecast: 16 carries, 69 rushing yards, 3 receptions, 20 receiving yards, 0 touchdowns, 11.1 fantasy points
Marques Colston, NO, WR (91-percent started)
Matchup: at Dal
The facial expression on Colston's face pretty much says it all. The once steady producer has become a true king of inconsistency. For those in standard formats, he's dropped several yule logs over the past four weeks, hitting pay-dirt just once while averaging an unexciting 57.0 yards per game. His unreliability shouldn't be overly surprising. In a spread-the-wealth system, erratic production is common, even for Jimmy Graham. Another vanilla effort could be on tap for the wideout this week. Dallas largely failed to ground the Steelers' pass game a week ago, giving up 339 passing yards and two scores to Ben Roethlisberger. But with Morris Claiborne expected to return to action after missing last week's game due to post-concussion effects, the Cowboys, on track to make the playoffs, should elevate their game against Drew Brees. Due to their strong safety play, WR1s have netted just 57.0 yards per game versus the 'Boys this year. Par for the course over the past few weeks, Colston will be more WR3 than WR1 material in Week 16.
Fearless Forecast: 4 receptions, 65 receiving yards, 0 touchdowns, 9.5 fantasy points
Matchup: vs. Cle
From afar, Decker is a man that has it all -- fame, fortune, good looks, Peyton Manning, a rather busty significant other. We all would gladly accept eternal damnation to be in his shoes. However, his fantasy profile isn't indicative of his outward image. Yes, he's contributed soundly at times (e.g. last week at Baltimore), but in other instances he's vanished, leaving owners in the dumps. His unpredictable lull form Weeks 10-13 certainly left investors scratching their heads. Though he's riding a two-game upswing, the former Golden Gopher could bury supporters at the most inopportune time. The Browns boast arguably the league's most underrated secondary. Joe Haden and Sheldon Brown underwhelmed last week against Kirk Cousins, but, when on the field together, they've held many marquee receivers in check. Since Haden's return in Week 11, notable names Miles Austin, Pierre Garcon and Mike Wallace posted marginal numbers against the duo. Combined the DBs have surrendered a QB rating of just 76.1. And WR2s have averaged a mere 55.7 yards per game versus Cleveland on the year. Toss in Denver's renewed emphasis on the ground and the early blowout potential, and it's certainly possible Decker pulls a 'Danario' in Week 16.
Fearless Forecast: 4 receptions, 53 receiving yards, 0 touchdowns, 8.3 fantasy points
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