burnett104Poor weather and poor planning by MLB officials have forced the New York Yankees to look further down their depth chart for a fourth starting pitcher in their would-be elimination game Tuesday night against the Detroit Tigers. Unfortunately for Yankees fans on the verge of despondency and teeth-gnashing, that pitcher is the enigmatic A.J. Burnett, he of the 11-11 record and the whopping 5.15 ERA.

So how are we all feeling about this? Well, as a Yankees fan, I personally have as much faith in Carol Burnett taking the mound for the Yanks in such an important game, but I'm afraid her signature ear-tug would get her called for a balk.

A.J. Burnett, meanwhile, is caught in a storm of few believing he can get the job done.  He's not making any guarantees but believes that he has enough confidence to succeed:

"I'm going to bring everything I've got. And just let A.J. loose out there."

Hey, be careful what you unleash, A.J.!

Of course, there are many Stockholm-syndrome-suffering Yankees fans

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In what could have been his final game as a member of the New York Mets, would-be free-agent shortstop Jose Reyes collected a bunt single in his first at-bat, called it quits early and took a seat on the bench for the rest of the Mets' 3-0 win over Cincinnati.

The 2011 National League batting champion would not see the field again.

So why the early exit? The abbreviated 1-for-1 performance inched his season batting average up to a National League-leading .337 and he wanted to quit while he was .002 ahead of Milwaukee Brewers outfielder Ryan Braun for the top spot.

So instead of adding some extra hits to guarantee the title, Reyes instead chose to put himself in a position where he wouldn't lose it. Braun needed to collect at least three hits in Wednesday's game against Pittsburgh, but he fell short.

ESPN New York's Adam Rubin reports the decision to leave the game belonged to Reyes alone and manager Terry Collins said he honored the request in order to maintain the respect between him

METSYANKEESWith yearlong renovations looming at PNC Field in Scranton-Wilkes Barre, the New York Yankees need a temporary home for their eponymous Triple-A affiliate. Unfortunately, not even Michael Scott's  ex-girlfriend and local Scranton real estate agent Carol can seem to find them a new home in the greater Tri-State area.

See, Major League Baseball has a convenient anti-trust exemption that allows its member organizations to control entire swaths of the country. It's this rule that prevents the Athletics from closing up shop in Oakland and moving to San Jose without the San Francisco Giants signing off on it. It's this rule that allowed Baltimore Orioles owner Peter Angelos to reap huge financial benefits in exchange for letting Major League Baseball relocate the Montreal Expos to Washington, D.C.

So when the Yankees came knocking in nearby Newark, New Jersey, home of the struggling independent Newark Bears and their downtown stadium, the other area team, the New York Mets, blocked the move.

orioles923It's not going to be enough to push their avian neighbor, the football Ravens, from the top of the Baltimore sports fan's consciousness, but the Orioles are having another positive September run.

Indeed, this month marks the second straight year the team is putting up a winning record in September under manager Buck Showalter.

But unlike last year, the Orioles are affecting the playoff races in the American League.

In the past 11 games, the Orioles are 8-3, having won series against the streaking Tampa Bay Rays, the one-time contender Los Angeles Angels and a shame-spiraling Boston Red Sox team. On Thursday night, it continued as the O's took down the Detroit Tigers, a team that has not won a game since it clinched the AL Central and is fighting a team with the same record, the Texas Rangers, for home-field advantage in the first round of the ALDS.

While the Tigers have at least clinched October baseball, the Rays are weathering their struggles to stay in the race, and the Angels hang

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With his signature cutter speeding past frozen Minnesota Twins outfielder Chris Parmalee for strike three, New York Yankees closer Mariano Rivera collected his 43rd save of the season and a 6-4 win for his team. Just another day at the office for the reliable and efficient worker, but Monday was more special: Rivera's 602nd career save tops Trevor Hoffman's career total of 601, giving him sole possession of baseball's  all-time saves record.

Not that Rivera needs that quantity of saves to assure him the title of "greatest closer ever," but his ownership of the record gives the designation a little extra oopmh, and vice versa. If we had counted his postseason saves (42, just like his uniform number) Rivera would have set the all-time record months ago. Regardless, Mariano's greatness shouldn't be measured in numbers; it can only be accounted for in total coolness in the face of pressure and the number of opposing fans he charms with his proselytizing cut fastball. See it once and

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With less than two weeks of the 2011 regular season to go and a near-guarantee that the postseason is in their future, the New York Yankees can grin comfortably at their squabbling division rivals in the rearview mirror and instead focus on organizing the team for the playoffs. Some elements of the machine are firm and unchanging: Mark Teixeira is the first baseman. Curtis Granderson is the center fielder. CC Sabathia is the Game 1 pitcher.

But when one looks at the Yankees' current 40-man roster and disabled list one counts a whopping five different gentlemen who, at one point or another in their lives, have been paid money to squat behind home plate wearing a mask and various other items of bodily protection. The Yankees have too many catchers!

Or do they? {YSP:MORE}

The five in question are starter Russell Martin, injured backup Francisco Cervelli, heralded rookie phenom Jesus Montero, less-heralded rookie phenom Austin Romine, and grizzled veteran Jorge Posada. Granted, Posada has

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Nine innings and nine items, (plus an extra inning — on us!) to get you going. Ladies and gentleman of the Stew, take a sip of morning Juice.

1. Slow and Lowe: Welp, it took Atlanta Braves pitcher Derek Lowe over 500 plate appearances in his career and 38 years on Earth, but he finally hit his first-ever home run on Wednesday — and it counted. Not since 2003, when Randy Johnson smacked his first homer in his grizzled 40th year, has a pitcher broken a lifelong homerless drought at such an old age. Lowe went yard in the Braves' 3-1 win over the Washington Nationals and, oh, he also pitched six strong innings for the win. That's what he's paid for — not that long ball nonsense.

Watch the ball fly anyway

The Braves bullpen did its part, too: Irish Eric O'Flaherty and H-less Jonny Venters contributed a perfect inning each while Craig Kimbrel set the MLB record for most saves by a rookie closer at 41, breaking the high mark set just last season by the Texas Rangers' Neftali Feliz. Mazel

cc_beats_red_soxNine innings and nine items to get you going. Ladies and gentleman of the Stew, take a sip of morning Juice.

1. Fifth time is the charm: After four losses against the rival Boston Red Sox to start his season, New York Yankees ace CC Sabathia finally notched a win Monday night by the score of 5-2. The Yankees moved within a game of the AL East division lead as Sabathia became the first pitcher to allow 10 hits and strike out 10 batters in the same game since ... John Lackey, coincidentally the opposing pitcher on Tuesday.

Lackey made news in the game by intentionally plunking Francisco Cervelli on the arm in retribution for Cervelli's too-enthusiastic celebration of his fifth inning home run over the Green Monster. The benches cleared but no shoves or punches were exchanged, just menacing glares and perhaps some casual nods of familiarity.

2. Almost purr-fect: Detroit Tigers starter Doug Fister retired the first 18 batters he faced but was supported with just one run by his offense in