Editor's note: Yahoo! Sports will examine the offseason of every MLB team before spring training begins in mid-February. Our series continues with the New York Mets.

2012 record: 74-88
Finish: Fourth place, NL East
2012 final payroll: $103.7 million
Estimated 2013 opening day payroll: $90 million
Yahoo! Sports offseason rank: 28th
Hashtags: #byebay #tweetingGM #burgerSSRI #humblebrag #refi #flyingwallendas #vegasbaby #wilponfail #outfieldofdoom #mess

OFFSEASON ACTION

The masterwork that was Sandy Alderson's handling of the R.A. Dickey trade this offseason should be studied, dissected and, whenever possible, emulated. He turned a 38-year-old pitcher on a one-year contract into six years of the game's best catching prospect, six years of a frontline pitching prospect, a high-ceiling 18-year-old and a stopgap catcher. And when your owner needs a tourniquet to stop hemorrhaging money, this is the sort of deal a general manager must concoct to keep hope afloat and progress alive.At least the Mets will have David Wright for what projects to be a painful 2013. (AP)

2012 record: 69-93
Finish: Fifth place, NL East
2012 final payroll: $89.9 million
Estimated 2013 opening day payroll: $45 million
Yahoo! Sports offseason rank: 29th
Hashtags: #beavis #23rdstate #tollingoftheironbell #thirtysomething #comegetthemjacob #trademe #dumps #swindlers #totheguillotine #sadface

OFFSEASON ACTION

The naked hubris of the Miami Marlins' all-time fire sale, the sort that would satisfy a pyromaniac or, you know, Beavis, is even more appalling six weeks later. When two jesters masquerade as baseball executives and strike deals that have every right to be struck down by the commissioner, they do not belong in the sport. Send Jeffrey Loria back to the art world, David Samson back to Morgan Stanley and sanity back to a franchise that so desperately needs it.

The first Bic flick was dealing Heath Bell

Editor’s note: Yahoo! Sports will examine the offseason of every MLB team before spring training begins in mid-February. Our series begins with the Houston Astros.

2012 record: 55-107
Finish: Sixth place, NL Central
2012 final payroll: $63.9 million
Estimated 2013 opening day payroll: $32 million
Yahoo! Sports offseason rank: 30th
Hashtags: #ifyoudonthaveanythingnicetosay #payrollhalfsies #boknows #latebloomers #operationshutdown #rekall #altuveasipad #fieldsofdreams #dunnlike #frasiernilesjim

OFFSEASON ACTION

It takes a mighty level of commitment to be as bad as the Houston Astros expect to be in 2013. It's not just halving their payroll, which already was among the five lowest in the major leagues, to what may be the most paltry. Nor is it dealing away most of their effective major league players, leaving a roster that resembles an animal carcass in vulture territory.

More than the deeds, it's the ethos that drives this franchise: If you are not going to be good, be bad. Be

Just like any document that runs 295 pages and 95,268 words, Major League Baseball's collective-bargaining agreement flirts often with the law of unintended consequences. Attempting to uphold a free-agent market while meddling with its ecosystem begs for chaos, and that's exactly what the basic agreement has given the sport this offseason.

Just like any person who challenges the very nature of the environment in which he operates, Scott Boras flirts often with the law of unintended consequences. Attempting to annually upend a draft system that neutered the value of amateurs begged for retrograde justice, and that's exactly what the basic agreement has given the sport this offseason.

Welcome to what seems like Round 20 of Baseball vs. Boras. Subtitle: The Artificial Market faces Mr. January. Agent Scott Boras has hit several January jackpots for his clients, totaling more than $750 million. (Getty Images)

Mr. January is a nickname bestowed on Boras by owners flabbergasted by his propensity to snag large free-agent deals after New Year's Day. Boras, long the sport's villain, is the

Using a vast network of sources, Yahoo! Sports has uncovered a compendium of New Year's resolutions throughout the baseball world. As is the case with most resolutions, they will be broken. Still, we are proud to bring you unparalleled insight into the minds of ballclubs, players, managers, executives, media members and other luminaries throughout the game.

Here is our New Year's gift to you.

Mike Trout resolves to become a conscientious objector, convinced that's the only way to ingratiate himself with an MVP voting bloc that hates WAR.

Alex Rodriguez resolves to stop blaming Carly Rae Jepsen for his phone number-slipping antics after getting pinch hit for in the ALCS. It's an infectious song, all right? Alex Rodriguez had a forgettable October. (AP)

Derek Jeter resolves to take a vow of celibacy, because adding to the greatest dating résumé in modern American history while a teammate swings and misses with an unknown model in the stands after the most emasculating moment of his storied career would be running up the

Inside the Los Angeles Angels clubhouse on payday next year, there are truths. Like the 33-year-old first baseman with nine years left on his $240 million contract. Nearby is the guy hitting behind him, in the first year of a $125 million deal. Which is not to be outdone by the fifth outfielder who may get 10 plate appearances a month fetching a bigger check than anyone, $24.6 million for the season.

Mike Trout was the AL MVP runner-up in 2012. (AP)

And over there sits the best player in baseball, not even making a million bucks.

Such is life in the major leagues, where the first three years of a player's career amount to forced poverty, at least by professional sporting standards. Surely Mike Trout can survive on a paltry $900,000 or so while Albert Pujols, Josh Hamilton and Vernon Wells, respectively, do rich-people things like donate $2 million to charity.

Well, what if Trout wants to give away a bunch of money – or, at least, get a Black Card? If the Angels are willing to lavish others with nine-figure deals, surely they

R.A. Dickey holds all the cards now. (AP)
For weeks, they haggled, feinted, postured and bargained. Now that Toronto Blue Jays and New York Mets executives have found common ground on a blockbuster trade in an offseason full of them, only one thing stands between the deal both parties desperately want and its embarrassing implosion.

A player.

Until 2 p.m. ET Tuesday, R.A. Dickey – reigning National League Cy Young winner and centerpiece of this trade, going from New York to Toronto – can determine whether the deal happens. The moment he agrees to a contract extension with the Blue Jays, he, Josh Thole and a prospect will head to Toronto for top prospects Travis d'Arnaud and Noah Syndergaard, catcher John Buck, cash and another prospect. If he doesn't, the deal blows up, almost certainly irreparably, especially embarrassing the Blue Jays, whose desire to contend this year is evident in the steep price they're willing to pay in talent.

Whether they'll do the same in dollars is why they were given a 72-hour window to

When the money exploded and turned baseball into an oligarchy, the sport's have-nots came to a realization: It would take a staggering level of mismanagement by the game's overlords for them ever to compete consistently again. And when that day came – when the New York Yankees or New York Mets or Boston Red Sox or, better yet, all three – bungled their advantage, every team with the wherewithal would strike and strike fast.

Then the Mets went shady and stopped competing.

And the Red Sox turned dysfunctional and stopped pitching.

Now the Yankees got decrepit and stopped spending.

So here we are, nine days before Christmas, and the rash of moves outside the Northeast corridor to improve teams continues on – and with the Mets, the most pathetic of the three kings thanks to an owner who has no business still owning a team, doing the selling no less. The Jays pounced on the Mets' rebuilding plans and have a deal for R.A. Dickey. (AP)

There is a reason the Toronto Blue Jays took the bold step to trade the best catching prospect in baseball, Travis d'Arnaud, to