Getty Images"If this goes on for a year or two then I'm probably done and I have to go back to working for a living." — Shawn Thornton, Boston Bruins

The last time Gary Bettman turned the keys and locked out the National Hockey League's players, it marked the last time Mark Messier, Scott Stevens, Al MacInnis, Adam Oates and Ron Francis played professionally.

They retired, as did others. The lockout "stole" their victory laps from us. As Ron Tugnutt told the Columbus Dispatch:

"Some of those guys — Messier, Francis (and) MacInnis, for sure — were players worthy of a farewell tour," said former Blue Jackets goaltender Ron Tugnutt, whose career also ended with the lockout. "It's pretty sad when the guys the league should be celebrating are allowed to walk off into the sunset without so much as a standing ovation across the league."

In the current work stoppage, there's similar concern that a wiped-out season means a forced finale for elite players like Daniel Alfredsson and Teemu Selanne (noooooo!) and role players like Thornton and Matt Cullen.

As Brian Rolston, veteran of three lockouts, told the Star-Tribune:

"I'm realistic. I'll be 40 years old," Rolston said. "If there's half a season, maybe somebody will be willing to sign an older player. But I'm not holding my breath. I'm content if I have to retire."

The lockout is thus seen as a Great Purge in the NHL, as veteran players lose their desire to press on after sitting out a year, clearing the way for younger and cheaper talent to better fit under the financial restrictions of a new CBA.

But is the mass exodus of players from the NHL because of a work stoppage actually a myth, compared the typical rate of attrition?

135513684Martin Brodeur is two years older than Roman Hamrlik. Both players have careers that span decades, which means that both players have now been through multiple work stoppages under NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman. At 40, Brodeur is near the end of his career; at 38, so is Hamrlik.

The difference between them? Brodeur hasn't been a militant voice during the NHL lockout, having come to grips with its inevitability when he pulled a second contractual year out of Lou Lamoriello as a free agent last summer.

Meanwhile, Hamrlik has become the face of players union fracturing after his caustic comments about the NHLPA and Donald Fehr in a Czech-language interview:

"I am disgusted. We have to push Fehr to the wall to get the deal. Time is against us. We lost 1/4 season, it is $425 million. Who will give it back to us? Mr. Fehr?

"There should be voting between players. Four questions - YES or NO - then count it. If half of players say let's play, then they should sign new CBA. If there is no season he should leave and we will find someone new. Time is our enemy."

With that comment, many viewed Hamrlik as the enemy of the NHLPA.

"I don't think he ever addressed it inside of our locker room as far as the PA's concerned, and he has to go out in front of the media and show a sign of weakness," said Brodeur, "from a player that should know better at his age."

Hockey mascots serve some vital functions during the game. Who else can get the crowd clapping, or fire T-shirts into it? Who else can dump popcorn on the heads of visiting fans? Who else can inappropriately touch female patrons during photo ops? (OK, the players might have that last angle covered.)

Who else can dance like there's no tomorrow? MASCOTS, that's who. Mascots like Sharky, who entertains the crowd at Kölner Haie (Cologne Sharks) games in the Deutsche Eishockey Liga. By getting crunk. (NSFW warning: Song played in the arena contains some adult language.)

Would anyone be surprised if we sliced up Sharky's stomach and discovered a license plate, a tire and the Jabbawockeez?

Sharky is part of a legacy of hockey mascots with a mastery of the dance. We eagerly await the day when the KHL expands to Germany, so we can see Shark vs. Satanic Snowman in a viral Gangnam Style clip. (Not for nothing, but Shark vs. Satanic Snowman is on SyFy this weekend, starring Deborah Gibson and Antonio Sabato, Jr.)

If only the Federal Mediation and Conciliation Service could settle the NHL lockout as quickly as it dropped Guy Serota from the mediation.

On Monday afternoon, Serota was named by the independent federal agency as one of three mediators assigned to the collective bargaining dispute between the NHL and the NHLPA.

Within moments of the announcement, intrepid hockey fans had discovered Serota's Twitter feed, which identified him as "Commissioner with Federal Mediation and Conciliation Service, United States Government." Serota's worked with the FMCS for 15 years.

The feed featured several partisan political comments, referencing "Karl Rove and Republican math" and "Great morning here in USA! Obama is still President. Restores my faith in the American voter (after 2 terms George W)."

But it also featured a slew of off-color jokes; some inspired by late night talk show host Craig Ferguson, whose term "ass mode" was cited by Serota out of context (and the amusement of others); and this one that referenced comedian Sarah Silverman in a clunky, uncomfortable tweet:

SEROROORRAYeah …

The hockey Twittersphere gleefully piled on Serota, mocking the sudden celebrity. He deleted his Twitter feed, although it was soon resurrected with a message claiming the feed had been hacked.

ESPN's Pierre LeBrun reached Serota, who said his feed had in fact been hacked and that he was not running his new Twitter account, i.e., it was an imposter who scooped up the I.D. when Serota deleted the account.

The FMCS apparently had seen enough, however. In one of the least surprising moves of the NHL lockout, Serota was removed from the case, just over two hours after the initial announcement of the NHL mediation.

Here are your Puck Headlines: a glorious collection of news and views collected from the greatest blogosphere in sports and the few, the proud, the mainstream hockey media.

Twitter• Guy Serota is part of the Federal Mediation and Conciliation Service mediation team that will hopefully facilitate an end to the NHL lockout. He also had one hell of a Twitter feed before he hastily deleted it when hockey fans found it. Anyhoo, this tweet and these tweets and also these tweets help maintain the legacy. The Sporting News has more.

• David Backes, Kevin Westgarth and Mathieu Schneider held an NHLPA 'ask me anything' on Reddit today. Among the highlights was Westgarth on why there wasn't a new CBA this summer: "We were available throughout the summer, unfortunately it seems the NHL was hell bent on putting pressure on the players with the Lockout. I wish it was as simple as spending a certain amount of time together, negotiating, but its very frustrating to see how little progress can be made with a seemingly unwilling partner. [Reddit]

• A handy guide to decertification by the New York Times. [NYT]

• A handy guide to decertification from Eric Macramalla, for TSN. [TSN]

• The SB Nation blogs had an airing of grievances today about the NHL lockout. [SB Nation]

• Detroit Red Wings winger Todd Bertuzzi is not what you'd call optimistic about the fate of the 2012-13 season. As in he doesn't believe there's going to be one. [MLive]

• Did the NHL ask NBC to ignore the "Operation Hat Trick" charity game in Atlantic City? [NY Rangers Blog]

• Ken Campbell on outspoken players: "Players might want to keep that in mind the next time they go to their computer or phone to vent their anger with the rest of the world. There's nothing to be gained by wishing Bettman dead or complaining about missing paychecks. Winston Churchill once said the best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter. Sadly, he was right." [THN]

• Fair thee well, Mark Parrish. [PHT]

• Taylor Hall took the player of the week award from some poor under-appreciated AHL player. [NEWSOK]

Getty ImagesThe NHL lockout talks are in a stalemate. The NHLPA has been chatting up the idea of decertification, which could lead to a prolonged court battle with the League. Drastic times call for drastic measures, and the two sides took one on Monday:

Federal Mediation.

The Federal Mediation and Conciliation Service is an independent U.S. government agency that specializes in labor disputes. George H. Cohen, a federal mediator and director of FMCS, had participated in both the NBA and NFL lockouts. As late as Nov. 1, he told ESPN.com that he had contact with both the owners and the players in the NHL lockout.

His agency released the following statement today:

Federal Mediation and Conciliation Service Director George H. Cohen issued the following statement today on the ongoing labor negotiations between the National Hockey League and the National Hockey League Players' Association:

"I have had separate, informal discussions with the key representatives of the National Hockey League and the National Hockey League Players' Association during the course of their negotiations for a successor collective bargaining agreement. At the invitation of the FMCS, and with the agreement of both parties, the ongoing negotiations will now be conducted under our auspices. I have assigned Deputy Director Scot L. Beckenbaugh, Director of Mediation Services John Sweeney, and Commissioner Guy Serota to serve as the mediators."

"Due to the extreme sensitivity of these negotiations and consistent with the FMCS's long-standing practice, the Agency will refrain from any public comment concerning the future schedule and/or the status of the negotiations until further notice."

Essentially, this is the players and owners looking for guidance on how to settle this dispute from a third party.

Edit: It will no longer be Guy Serota, as his interesting Twitter feed has gotten him removed from the case. But we'll never forget forget your contributions, guy. Sorry, I'm calling you "guy" because I forget your name. What was it again? Here's the FCMS statement:

Within one hour after I issued a press release announcing that further negotiations between the NHL and NHLPA would be conducted under the auspices of the FMCS, it has been called to my attention that there are issues involving an allegedly hacked Twitter account associated with Commissioner Guy Serota, one of the mediators I assigned. Accordingly, in order to immediately dispel any cloud on the mediation process, and without regard to the merits of the allegations, I have determined to take immediate action, namely to remove Commissioner Serota from this assignment."

"There will be no further comment from the FMCS on this matter.

Sigh. Moving on.

Said NHL deputy commissioner Bill Daly to the Star Tribune:

"The FMCS reached out to both sides independently, and apparently we both agreed that we are prepared to explore the process. I have no level of expectation at this point. We'll see how it goes and perhaps something good will come of it."

As Bob McKenzie of TSN reports, the mediation is not binding, and that's key: This isn't going to be a mediator issuing a ruling that'll end the lockout.

In fact, it could be a harbinger of doom.

Getty ImagesThere haven't been many effective pressure points during the NHL lockout. The start of the season, the Winter Classic, the All-Star Game and the start of the NBC television schedule in the U.S. have all been sacrificed in 2012. Players are relatively happy skating and collecting pay checks in Europe. Owners don't seem to have a sense of urgency either.

But one gear in the NHL's financial machine has been mighty squeaky lately: Sponsors and marketing partners.

Molson Coors was one of the most prominent sponsors to lament the lockout, with its CEO declaring that there will be reparations for the damage done to the brewer's sales sans hockey this year.

On Monday, Sports Business Daily delivered a combination punch to the League regarding its sponsors.

Terry Lefton had a piece on the NHL's licensees losing out on holiday sales due to the lockout (reg. required):

"Our NHL business is off substantially," said Mitchell Modell, CEO of the 150-store sporting goods chain which bears his family name. "The dollars are small relatively, but the percentages are big. Thank God for the NBA, because it came back strong last year [after that league's lockout] and they are more than offsetting our NHL sales."

Last spring's strong NHL playoffs resulted in impressive sales for NHL-licensed products, especially notable since the Boston Bruins' 2011 Stanley Cup Championship was such a bellwether for the league. Accordingly, year-to-year sales of NHL merchandise for licensed sports ecommerce specialist Fanatics.com increased 14 percent from January into this month. However, sales of those same goods from July through last week on Fanatics.com showed a 14 percent decrease. Fanatics operates ecommerce for the league, but those totals do not include sales on NHL.com.

Or lack thereof.

So the holidays are bleak for the NHL's marketing partners; what about the future?

It's a Monday edition of Marek vs. Wyshynski beginning at 2 p.m. ET/11 a.m. PT, and we're talking about the following and more:

Special Guest Stars: Author Tal Pinchevsky on his Iron Curtain hockey book "Breakaway."

• Wysh on the charity hockey game in Atlantic City this past weekend, including NHL players in the casino.

• The NHLPA wrestles with decertification; what would it mean for the lockout?

• News and notes from around the hockey world.

Question of the Day: What are you doing to get your hockey fix during the lockout?

Email your answers to puckdaddyblog@yahoo.com or tweet them with the hashtag #MvsW to @wyshynski or @jeffmarek.

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