CC Sabathia failed again in the playoffs, the Phillies beat the Brewers 5-2 in Game 2 of the NLDS, and Milwaukee is now just one defeat from the off-season.

After a weak showing in Game 1 of the National League Division Series, the Brewers were relying on their ace to help even the series before it shifted to Miller Park on Saturday.

But Sabathia, continuing his puzzling postseason pattern, allowed five runs, six hits and four walks over 3 2/3 IP, his shortest outing since April 11, when he still played for the Cleveland Indians. Sabathia, who also melted down twice against the Red Sox in the ALCS a season ago, has a 7.92 ERA in five career playoff appearances.

The Phillies got to him with a five-run second, which was set up in part by pitcher Brett Myers' tenacious at-bat that led to a walk, and keyed by Shane Victorino's grand slam. Sabathia finished with 98 pitches, so it shouldn't be a big deal for him to return for Game 5 — if the Brewers still are around.

That type of doubt is

The rise of the Tampa Bay Rays began before Evan Longoria made his first major league appearance, but the rookie third baseman gave the club a genuine superstar-in-the-making in the middle of the lineup at a time when that's what it took to go from the basement to the penthouse of the AL East. You might have heard that he had a monster performance in his postseason debut on Thursday, hitting two homers in a 6-4 win over the White Sox in Game 1 of the ALDS.

You also might not have heard —or heck, not even made the connection — but Longoria's name is almost identical to another superstar, this one from Hollywood. The Rays' Longoria knows about this "other" Longoria.

Boy, oh, boy does he know about her.

Shortly after the Rays wrapped up their first division title at Comerica Park in Detroit, the more masculine of the Longorias sat down for the latest Answer Man session.

Question: Why does every picture of you on the Internet look like the woman who's married to Tony Parker?

Eva(n)

A few hours had passed since the Tampa Bay Rays clinched the American League East, and the business of the playoffs, and winning them, was at hand and on the mind.

The Rays expect to have an advantage in their first-round series against the Chicago White Sox because a majority of the games, including the first two, are scheduled for Tropicana Field in St. Petersburg. Nobody seems to like to play there.

Nobody except the Rays, who this have the most home wins (58) of any team since the 1998 Yankees, who won 62 times in the Bronx before their World Series run.

"Wow," Game 1 starter James Shields said. "A lot of firsts with this team. You know, it doesn't surprise me. We're pretty much lights-out at home."

Ah-ha! So it's dark in there? Visitors cannot see.

"It's not dark," Shields said. "It's just not outdoors. Not many teams are used to playing indoors like that. There's a lot of intangibles when it comes to playing in a dome. It's a little faster. And not many people liked to come

Back at Wrigley Field for his first time since 2005, Manny Ramirez wasted no time in riling up the Cubs' faithful. He went 2-for-4, drew a walk that loaded the bases for James Loney's grand slam and then chopped a low and outside pitch from Sean Marshall into a monster home run.

But no matter what kind of performance Manny might have turned in, he was destined to get a lot of guff from the citizens of the left field bleachers (though unfortunately some of it crossed the line as one world-class moron attempted to throw a ball at Manny and was promptly arrested by the Chicago Police.)

So, without further delay and on a much more fun note, follow the jump for the Top 10 Things Manny Ramirez (Probably) Heard From Wrigley's Left Field Bleachers:

10. Did a "No. 99" order a large supreme deep dish, extra 'shrooms?

9. You can have as many tickets as you want, just stop hurting my elderly father!

8. Hey Man-Ram! Any advice for breaking a curse? C'mon! Spill it!

7. He high-fived me! Oh, no!

This and every weekday a.m., let's rise and shine together with the freakiest and streakiest happenings from around the Major League Baseball posteason championship tournament. Today's Roll Call starts at the Big Artie, where Jon Lester assumed the position as head of household for the Boston Red Sox to give the Los Angeles (etc.) Angels yet another bitter taste of playoff beans.

Game of the Day: Red Sox 4, Angels 1

Three-parent home: Joining Big Papi and Boston's new Manny, Jason Bay, just call left-hander Jon Lester one tough Mother after shutting down the Angels in Game 1 of the ALDS. Josh Beckett has been ailing (Stan's Rodeo Cream apparently cannot do for the ailing oblique as it does for rubbing out blisters), so Lester continued a couple of streaks. His own, of pitching like Boston's true ace, and the crazy-long one the Olde Towne Teame has over the Angels — which goes all the way back to the 1986 ALCS.

Lester the Sequester: Already having been on the mound for a World Series

Though he's labored through three innings — 61 pitches and four walks already — Cubs ace Ryan Dempster has kept the Dodgers off the board with his grit, nicely-formed playoff beard and that little glove-flip he does before delivering each pitch. Here, BLS contributor David Brown offers a tribute to Dempster's quirky habit.

His glove-hand wave recalls a slice of Daniel-san "doing the crane" in Karate Kid I, II or III.

Or a spasming beauty queen.

Or a hairier Madonna suggesting she wants to Vogue again.

Strike a pose. Strike again. Strike three, you're out!

Ryan Dempster has joked that he's just fanning himself but all he's really been is being fashionably quirky on the way to a 17-6 record, an All-Star selection and starting the first game of the playoffs for the Cubs.

Every time he winds and throws, Dempster risks angering the Carpal Tunnel Gods, but he does his little shell game, anyway, to distract hitters from zoning in on what might be a split-fingered fastball grip. Or not.

From the station that has brought you 2,321 FrankTV commercials so far (today):

As each of the division champions and wild-card teams are determined, Big League Stew asks World Series hopefuls to issue a formal acceptance speech and explain why they're the team that will be hoisting The Commissioner's Trophy in late October. Last ups go to the Chicago White Sox, who used every game of the regular season, plus one, to earn their invitation to the playoffs.

Mr. Commissioner, Chairman Reinsdorf, Vice Chairman Einhorn, Senator and Democratic Presidential Nominee Barry, General Manager Williams, Mayor Daley, the Ghost of Mr. Veeck, and of Mr. Veeck's Wooden Leg with the Ashtray, Da Coach, Walter, Fridge, M.J., Scottie, Horace, Phil, Ozzie, Harold, Hawkeroo, Stone Pony, Our Fellow Illianas, County Cookers, Chicagoons, South Side Hitmen and Women, Armour Squares, Bronzevillains, Bridgeporters, Comiskey Parkers, U.S. Cell-Outs, and Pale Hoser fans everywhere.

We're sorry this is coming a little late. It took us a little longer than expected to win our division, but as