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    David Brown

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    • Morning Juice: A doctor will see you shortly, Mr. Hamels

      This and every weekday a.m. during baseball season, let's rise and shine together to recap the most recent diamond doings. Roll Call starts in triage, where doctors again are checking out Cole Hamels after he left another game early because of another injury.

      Game of the Day: Phillies 7, Nationals 1

      King Cole of Comedy: Hamels was cruising along, with everything going splendidly against the Nationals when he tried to field a bunt by pitcher John Lannan and sprained his left ankle.

      X-rays were negative, though most of the crowd at Citizens Bank Park had to be treated for shortness of breath. In what should be the rallying cry/marketing slogan for the '09 Phils, "Hamels expects to make his next start."

      "There's some frustration, almost comedy," Hamels said. "Last time I felt like I was doing really well. This time I felt like I was finally getting in a good grove again. I don't know what else to do but laugh about it."

      Dainty: One of the most wanted men on the off-season talk-show

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    • Morning Juice: These Red Sox go all the way to 11

      This and every weekday a.m. during baseball season, let's rise and shine together to recap the most recent diamond doings. Roll Call starts in Cleveland (hello, Cleveland!) where the Red Sox kept on rockin' and rollin' to their 11th straight victory.

      Game of the Day:
      Red Sox 3, Indians 1

      Smmmmmokin': They left behind the Yankees drama at Fenway, but the road-trippin' Red Sox kept meeting their own standards, thanks to solid pitching and another Manny-lite performance by Jason Bay. Don’t touch, point at, or even look at the Red Sox right now. They are that hot. They can't be played.

      Bet on the Bay:
      All it took was Bay turning around a 99-mph fastball from Kerry Wood for a three-run homer in the ninth. Earlier in the BoSox's streak, Bay connected for another big homer against another closer, Mariano Rivera. I was at a wedding in Providence, R.I. last summer right after the Red Sox traded Manny and got Bay, and the bartender was not convinced about the quality of player Boston received in

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    • Monday Morning Juice: Pennsylvania has its way with Marlins

      This and every Monday morning, let's rise and shine together to review the weekend's top stories around the baseball-o-sphere. Countdown starts a-tickin' down in sunny Miami, home of the Marlins, who just got owned this week by the great state of Pennsylvania.

      FALLING: Fish fried
      Marlins go 0-6 against Pirates, Phillies

      After suffering a three-game sweep at Pittsburgh, the Marlins swam home and seemed on the verge of halting their losing streak on Friday night. But while protecting a three-run lead like Barney Fife would Otis the Drunk, closer Matt Lindstrom had an outing so enormously bad it could be seen from space. He let in seven runs — thanks to three walks and four hits, including Shane Victorino's two-out, go-ahead grand slam. It took Lindstrom 38 pitches to paint his masterpiece of horror, and it will take a much loooooooooonger time for his ERA (10.80) to dig its way out.

      The Phillies kept winning all weekend, tying the score in the ninth and winning in the 10th on Saturday and

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    • Morning Juice: Albert Pujols might be an RBI machine — literally

      This and every weekday a.m. during baseball season, let's rise and shine together to recap the most recent diamond doings. Roll Call meets in St. Louis, home of some of the nation's great laboratories — Monsanto, Purina, Anheuser-Busch — and its best baseball player, Albert Pujols.

      Game of the Day: Cardinals 12, Mets 8

      He's AhPu!: This is not in any way a steroids reference, but sometimes it really does seem like Albert Pujols was created in a lab; 3-for-4, including two homers, three RBIs, four runs scored and a stolen base to help the Cards sweep the Mets. Maybe AhPu was created in a "green" lab with recyclable, sustainable materials and with love, by Dr. Bunsen Honeydew and Beaker.

      "Perfect player, in my opinion," manager Tony La Russa said.

      Phat: AhPu is 29 years old but he's only two RBIs from 1000.

      "I don't look at that number, man," Pujols said. "I'm going to have, hopefully, if I stay healthy, plenty of RBI."

      He's got plenty more than most. Looking at the list of active players

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    • Answer Man: Joey Votto talks bowling, mustaches, hockey, Italy

      Toronto native Joey Votto had no idea what he was getting himself into. Standing inside the cramped, even claustrophobia-causing visitors clubhouse at Wrigley Field, the young Reds slugger became the most recent Answer Man subject before kicking off what would turn out to be a very good series for him in Chicago (5-11, 1 HR, 3 doubles, 2 runs 3 RBIs and 1 SB).

      The results were sometimes funny and occasionally enlightening, but also awkward. Some "Answer Men" work better than others — count Reds teammate Jay Bruce as someone who enjoyed our discussion — and it usually depends a lot on how the subject rolls with the oddball punches.

      So uncomfortable at times was Votto that his feelings were published in a Cincy-area newspaper mere minutes after our interview was over. How much did the '08 NL Rookie of the Year runner-up regret granting an interview to someone from Yahoo! Sports? Read for yourself. I'm including my thoughts in parentheses.

      David Brown: So you're in your living room

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    • Morning Juice: Brother, can you spare a jersey for Darren O'Day?

      This and every weekday a.m. during baseball season, let's rise and shine together to recap the most recent diamond doings. Roll Call starts in Toronto, a city in a foreign land, where sometimes a traveler might have visa problems. Well, that's nothing when compared with trying to get the right jersey into Canada.

      Game of the Day:
      Blue Jays 8, Rangers 7 (11 inn.)

      Not himself: The Texas infield huddled behind the pitcher's mound and watched with collective amusement as a man wearing Kason Gabbard's No. 30 jersey warmed up. They laughed because the pitcher wasn't Gabbard, but was instead Darren O'Day, who had been claimed on waivers from the Mets in the morning and arrived at Toronto's Rogers Centre an inning before he entered the game.

      From MLB.com:

      "The original plan," O'Day said, "was to go to the hotel. But [the traveling secretary] said, 'Go to the field, we might need you.' "

      Shirt off his back: Gabbard's O'Day's transaction was processed so suddenly, and he arrived so late, that

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    • LOLcats: With curses reversed, Cubs surely on way to Series

      The Cubs guaranteed themselves a World Series championship on Tuesday night.

      But wait: How did they do it in April? How did the Cubs do it, period, considering their challenging history?

      Simple: By challenging their history and beating it into submission.

      During the game with Cincinnati, the Cubs encountered another loose cat and endured another foul-ball incident with their own fans — in the same inning, no less — and yet they still were able to bea the Reds, and they still won 7-2.

      Clearly, the champions-elect have turned a cursed corner in Cubs chronicles.

      Thanks to a singular combination of 90 percent lack of skill and 10 percent lack of luck, the Cubs have failed to win the World Series each season since 1908.

      But it's more fun — or annoying, depending on your perspective — to pretend they haven't won in all of these years because of silly curses.

      After the jump, read about what happened in the soon-to-be fabled fourth inning that turned Cubs luck around for good.

      The Cubs had a

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    • Morning Juice: Mariners resurfacing after season at the bottom

      This and every weekday a.m. during baseball season, let's rise and shine together to recap the most recent diamond doings. Roll Call starts in Starbucks, Wash., where it must be something in the coffee for the Mariners, who woke up on the right side of the bed this season.

      Game of the Day: Mariners 4, Rays 2

      It's Jarrod! After Evan Longoria and Pat the Bat put the Rays on top with RBI doubles in the first inning, Jarrod Washburn settled in, struck out nine over seven and improved to 2-0 3-0. It must seem like 3,000,000-0 after the past three seasons in Seattle, where he had gone 23-43 without pitching that badly for the M's, who gave him the worst run-support for any AL starter in that span. Hey, they only scored four for him this time, but it was the defending AL champions, after all.

      Joe Maddon said Washburn was a different guy out there than in recent seasons.

      "He reinvented himself. I saw a different pitcher," said Maddon, who was the bench coach with the Angels when Washburn played

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    • Screen Schottzie: The coat Dusty Baker doesn't want you to see

      If you caught the Cubs-Reds game on TV on Tuesday night, consider yourself lucky. Temperatures in Chicago dipped to the low 40s, the wind whipped around and icy raindrops fell on Wrigley Field. Great night for a ballgame!

      Nobody would begrudge players — or coaches — on either side who felt the need to don a heavy winter coat in the dugouts. Conditions called for big coats. Dusty Baker thought so; he wore one.

      Until he went to the mound to make pitching changes, that is. Then, he got all Jack London on everyone by stripping down to the Reds classy fleece.

      And when Dusty got back into the relative safety of the bunker? Back comes the coat!

      There could be a reasonable explanation for the wardrobe changes, burt I prefer to think that Dusty didn't want to be heckled by the Wrigley fans who'd get on him about walking to the mound in a parka. Draw your own conclusions after checking the following photo sequence!

      Dusty's just chillin' (get it?) in his black winter coat as he gets ready to

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    • Morning Juice: Nationals renamed 'Zimmermen,' beat Braves

      This and every weekday a.m. during baseball season, let's rise and shine together to recap the most recent diamond doings. Roll Call begins in the District of Columbia, where the Nationals don't care how many Zimmermanns they have to add to the roster, or how many "N's" they have add to Zimmerman(n), just as long as they startt winningg.

      Game of the Day: Nationals 3, Braves 2

      Zimmerman(n)ia!: The major league debut of right-hander Jordan Zimmermann (right of Jesus Flores) was marked by chilly and wet weather, hardly anybody showing up to see it and less than hardly anybody waiting around to make sure the Nationals improved to 2-10. But that doesn't mean it didn't all happen, and that it wasn't a key moment in Nats history.

      Catch some Z's: Not to be confused with the franchise third baseman who almost has the same last name, Zimmermann allowed two runs and six hits over six innings in his first big league game. Ryan Zimmerman, who recently received a Longoria-ish contract extension,

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