There are only really three things you need to know about children: They always want chicken nuggets; if they don't want chicken nuggets, they want fruit snacks; and they love Chris Andersen, the Miami Heat's colorful "Birdman."

In these playoffs alone, we've seen a very young Coloradoan celebrate the former Denver Nuggets reserve and an older Heat supporter get considerably inkier in his praise of the Miami big man. We had not, however, seen a Baby Bird who combined both infancy and full faux tats.

Finally, thanks to Xiomy Gonzalez and Alexander Balaez, our long national nightmare is over.

Hey there, young fella. (Photo via @alxndrbalaez)

J.R. Smith is still looking for answers. (Ron Hoskins/NBA/Getty Images)

It's no secret that J.R. Smith can't buy a bucket these days — I mean, we've now even got a Twitter account mockumenting his every misfire. He's seemed lost for the last six games, and while he found a bit of rhythm in the fourth quarter of the New York Knicks' Game 4 loss to the Indiana Pacers, there's a chance that any revived scoring touch is either A) a mirage born of the Pacers calling off the dogs after building a 17-point lead or B) too little and too late, now that the Pacers have a 3-1 lead in the best-of-seven series.

Even after getting something going with 12 points on 5 for 10 shooting in the fourth, Smith is shooting just 28.1 percent from the field and 23.1 percent from 3-point range against Indiana, extending a cold snap that began with a 3-for-14 return from a one-game suspension for flooring Jason Terry with an elbow. Smith knows his poor play has hampered the Knicks' offense, and he accepted responsibility after Tuesday's loss, according to Howard Beck of the New York Times:

“My frustration level with myself is extremely high,” Smith said. “I take the blame for this whole series.” He made reference to the Boston series, adding: “I haven’t been playing myself. I haven’t played my part. I’ve been letting my teammates down. I’ve been letting my coaches down. It doesn’t feel good.”

Smith also acknowledged the stark difference between the sharp all-around ball he played late in the season and what he's provided recently, according to Newsday's Al Iannazzone:

"I have to play more efficient. I have to rebound the ball. One rebound, two rebounds is not enough. Paul George is out there getting 13, 14 rebounds. As a wing player like myself, I'm pretty much playing the same minutes. It's unacceptable. I have to keep him off the glass. I have to keep the other wings off the glass. Overall just play better."

Yes, he does. That's inarguable. What's sticking in my craw, though, is the "this whole series" part.

Sure, the book he signed up for Twitter to promote is called "Eleven Rings," but legendary NBA coach/Detroit Pistons consultant Phil Jackson actually has 13 rings — 11 earned directing the Chicago Bulls and Los Angeles Lakers, and two recognizing his work as a defensive-minded reserve forward on the 1970 and 1973 New York Knicks.

For many NBA types, rings won as a player would represent the pinnacle of achievement in the sport; in Jackson's case, though, they serve as sort of a precursor and accent mark to the story of his later coaching accomplishments. As such — and also because they aren't quite as flashy as what came later — it seems like we don't often see Jackson sporting the rings he won on the floor. One Zen Master Twitter follower wondered what they looked like:

@philjackson11 Phil can you post a picture of your two Knicks championship rings? I've never seen a picture of them.

— Sean (@sthomas141) May 14, 2013

Jackson, now throwing himself wholeheartedly into social media, was happy to oblige, and do so in a pretty perfectly Phil way:

Count the ringzzzzz. (Photo via @PhilJackson11)

"here’s the best I can do…the 2 Knick rings are in the front of the picture," Jackson tweeted.

Yep. (Nathaniel S. Butler/NBA/Getty Images)

New York Knicks shooting guard J.R. Smith checked into Game 4 against the Indiana Pacers with 7:11 remaining in the first quarter. Sixty seconds later, the struggling Sixth Man of the Year took his first shot of the night, a 27-foot 3-pointer. As has been the case with most of his other shots in this series — and, really, since he elbowed Jason Terry in the chin — he missed.

Moments later, this appeared on Twitter:

Yes.

— Did JR Smith Miss? (@DidJRSmithMiss) May 14, 2013

And a new meme was born.

A look around the league and the Web that covers it. It's also important to note that the rotation order and starting nods aren't always listed in order of importance. That's for you, dear reader, to figure out.

C: Blank on Blank. The PBS Digital series that exhumes lost interviews and animates the conversation offers a cool spin on an 1992 chat between Ann Liguori and legendary big man Wilt Chamberlain about the peaks and valleys of being a giant. (Hat-tip to SB Nation's Tom Ziller.)

PF: SB Nation. With a pivotal Game 5 on tap Tuesday night, Drew Garrison looks at how the Golden State Warriors were able to exploit the San Antonio Spurs' pick-and-roll coverages late in their Game 4 win, and how San Antonio can tighten up their defense to help take a 3-2 lead in their best-of-seven series.

SF: All Ball. Lang Whitaker revisits "The Reggie Miller Show," a real thing that actually existed, because someone out there knew all along just how enjoyable Reggie would be to watch and listen to on television. (Featuring a young Conan O'Brien!)

Just like my father always said: "If at first you don't succeed, make a joke out of the whole thing and throw a baseball into a crowd." It's not just advice. It's an ethos.

Good stuff, Amir Johnson. I don't suspect you'll be asked back to Rogers Centre any time soon, but I guess if John Wall got the chance to redeem himself after this rough outing at a Washington Nationals game, anything's possible.

Well, anything but not getting made fun of by your Toronto Raptors teammates for your lack of control:

Great first pitch by @iamamirjohnson -__- ....smh wrong sport not supposed to bounce it lol

— Quincy Acy (@QuincyAcy) April 19, 2013

Solid advice, Quincy Acy. You should try to remember that "don't bounce it" thing next time, Amir. Just file it away for safe keeping.

Video via AmirTV. Hat-tip to TrueHoop's Henry Abbott.

Chris Copeland drives on Roy Hibbert. (Nathaniel S. Butler/NBA/Getty Images)

The fears facing New York Knicks fans heading into the Eastern Conference semifinals focused on the Indiana Pacers' defense. In general, the concern was whether a best-in-the-league unit even stingier than the Boston Celtics group that gave the Knicks' O fits in Round 1 would prove too daunting a task. More specifically, the worries centered on whether a younger, faster, quicker and longer-limbed squad than Boston — featuring wing defenders capable of shutting off perimeter penetration one-on-one, a 7-foot-2 eraser capable of protecting the rim without requiring double teams and a system geared toward running opponents off the 3-point line — would eliminate the kind of open long-range looks born of dribble penetration and ball movement that made New York so dangerous during the regular season.

Through three games, those fears seem well-founded. New York's averaging just 90.3 points per game in the Eastern Conference semifinals, shooting 43.2 percent from the floor and 33.3 percent from 3-point range in the series, and is coming off a Game 3 suffocation that saw them set season lows in 3-point makes and attempts. The Knicks are averaging 100.9 points per 100 possessions against the Pacers, which represents a massive drop-off from their season-long efficiency (108.6-per-100, third-best in the NBA) and is heavily inflated by the Knicks' late-Game-2 run. New York averaged less than one point per possession in their Game 1 loss and scored at a heinous 82.6-per-100 clip in Game 3, which is a level of ineptitude miles beyond what even the absolute worst NBA offenses typically muster.

It's tempting to suggest that this is a matter of leading scorers Carmelo Anthony (29 for 70, 41.4 percent) and J.R. Smith (11 for 42 in the series, 26.2 percent) just being embroiled in a slump from which they need to shake loose. The reality, though, is that Indiana defends the scoring pair roughly this well — both Anthony and Smith shot less 38 percent against the Pacers this season — and that the poor 100.9-per-100 efficiency mark (which would have tied the Knicks with the Milwaukee Bucks and Detroit Pistons for the league's ninth-worst offense this year) is actually a stark improvement over New York's regular-season numbers against Indiana (91.8-per-100, their lowest mark against any opponent this season). This is not a cold snap or a fluke; this is what happens when an excellent defense knows how you're going to attack them, and you continue to attack them that way.

With that in mind, Game 4 might be a good time for Knicks coach Mike Woodson to consider attacking the Pacers a different way — by counteracting Indiana's grinding size by going smaller earlier and trying to kickstart a flagging offense by inserting little-used rookie Chris Copeland, whom Woodson has said could see more minutes in Indiana on Tuesday. That's a good idea.

Dwyane Wade hasn't made many headlines with his play this postseason, averaging just 12.3 points per game and shooting under 44 percent from the floor for the Miami Heat as he works through a right-knee bone bruise. (Not that his relative absence seems to be hurting the Heat much.)

With his play not generating much attention, noted fashion plate Wade has taken to raising eyebrows with his pre- and postgame attire. First, he hit us with a floral patterned jacket and matching shirt from Versace's Spring 2013 runway collection. Then, before Monday's Game 4 against the Chicago Bulls, he brought out this adventurous, ankle-bearing, double-breasted number:

Looking sharp, Dwyane. (Screencap via Larry Brown Sports)

Hit the jump for more on Wade's high-water look, from our friends at the Yahoo! Sports Minute and TNT's "Inside the NBA."

[Also: Heat hold Bulls to franchise playoff-low 65 points in blowout]