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It's been a somewhat disappointing season for cash-strapped Everton as they sit eighth in the table (exactly where they finished last season) and David Moyes realizes that he's lucky the roving wave of impatience hasn't washed over him yet. After nine years with the same club (the third longest term in the Premier League right now), Moyes isn't hanging to his job until an angry mob pries his cold, dead hands off his club track jacket like so many other managers when things turn nasty. He'll go whenever the fans want him gone.

Said Moyes on TalkSport's Keys & Gray Feminist Football Hour:

"I've always said I wouldn't want the supporters to get fed up of me because at the end of the day it's their football club, it's not mine. I'm there to do the job and try and do it to the best of my ability.

"If I got the feeling they were fed up with me then I'd do something about it. But I don't at the moment, I still see it as one of the biggest clubs in England, and I'm really thrilled to be

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Shakira posted the above photo of herself with Barcelona defender and no longer secret boyfriend Gerard Pique to Twitter on Tuesday. Fans swooned, tabloids plotted pregnancy rumors and, according to AS and Marca, Real Madrid pulled her music from its pre-match playlists.

Though Shakira jams have been a staple at the Santiago Bernabeu over the years, her romantic alignment with a member of Real's rivals has apparently made her musical stylings no longer welcome. The Spanish press say that there was no official reason given for the change, but it seems unlikely that Real Madrid's stadium DJ would coincidentally just happen to stop liking her tunes independent of her getting slobbered on by Pique.

Also, Real Madrid president Florentino Perez would like you all to know that, as of now, this never happened...

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n_20110225195926_antes_de_pique_shakira_fue_socia_del_espanyolIt may look like he was giving her a Real shirt with her name on the back in 2004, but he was actually pulling it away so he could burn it.

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Crystal Palace introduced American football style cheerleaders -- The Crystal Girls -- last December and in the time since, Palace have won just four of 18 matches (all at home) and dropped to just outside the relegation zone in the Championship. So as frustrations rise and irrational thoughts take old, some fans have decided that the Crystal Girls are to blame for this.

From Metro:

'They are just pole dancers on grass and they should be stopped — they are not doing the team any favours,' said one internet blogger.

Gareth Pollock, 24, said: 'When they come out waving their pom-poms I just hang my head.'

He added: 'They put everyone off the game — you see the players eyeing them up when they should be focusing on the game. The sooner they go the better.'

Captain of the unpaid Crystal Girls, Charlotte Duffy, points out how stupid that is (via the News Shopper):

"I think people need to look at the facts, because the team are doing well at home and have not lost a game since we have

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I'm Bert Tiddle and you've never heard of me. I record many unknown facts about the inner workings of professional football during my playing days with Ipswich Town, Coventry City, Sheffield United and several other clubs that I can't remember right now -- all before the Premier League came along and ruined everything. Most of these facts involve me getting blackout drunk and laughing at Sam Allardyce and Alan Shearer. Hell. I've already ruined the secret bit, haven't I? Sam Allardyce is a numpty.

Keenan, one of my 18 kids, has been reading these Secret Footballer columns in the Guardian to me while I eat my breakfast, even though I never asked him to and he can't read. Which is really quite embarrassing for him since he has to be at least 16 or 19 years old at this point. I always tell him that, too. Enough about slow Keenan, though. The point is, these Secret Footballer columns are a waste of anonymity and don't tell you much. So old Bert is going to do you all a favor and tell you

Uruguay jumped out to an early 3-1 lead in the first half of their friendly against Ireland on Tuesday, but defender Martin Caceres helped Ireland get back in it with a bit of comedy. In the 48th minute, Caceres tackled two Irish players at once with a desperate challenge in the box that actually made his opponents look sillier than him.

Caceres wasn't booked for his two for one deal, though the ref did award Ireland a penalty that Keith Fahey converted. Still, it wouldn't be enough for Ireland, as they lost 3-2.

Martin Caceres next goal? Taking out four opponents with one tackle. He sets his goals high.

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Our mustaches are too strong to fail!

When Roman Abramovich paid Phil Scolari -- an undoubtedly great manager with a World Cup win to his credit -- £7.5 million to leave Chelsea in February of 2008, many laughed. They said it was another example of the Russian billionaire being rash and failing to let his football people do their jobs. Of course, when Guus Hiddink came in, salvaged the season and won the FA Cup, those shouts quieted just a bit, but the jokes about that massive payout persisted.

Now, it seems it was worth every penny, though. Said Scolari in a Brazilian TV interview (via the Guardian):

"I didn't leave Chelsea because of sabotage from the players but it is true that it was difficult to control the dressing room," Scolari said.

"Drogba believed he was the star in the squad and I did have conflicts with him. He wanted to go to a hospital in Paris because of an injury but I said no.

"That was my first problem because [Nicolas] Anelka did well in his absence and scored

Franck Ribery and Patrice Evra were back in the French squad for Tuesday's first home match since their roles as leading punks in the punk parade that was France's World Cup implosion. Neither one started the friendly against Croatia, but that didn't keep fans from getting their boos in.

From Reuters:

Both were booed when the stadium announcer read the substitutes' names at an unusually fast pace before kick off and the picture of the players sitting on the France bench disappeared from the big screen.

In the second half, though, Ribery got the chance to have the crowd's emotions rain down on him like asbestos as he entered the match.

Huge boos came from the stands when the influential midfielder replaced Florent Malouda on the hour but other parts of the stadium began to chant his name.

"It was a bit special. It is true that there were some boos when I came on, but then some fans chanted my name," Ribery told French TV channel TF1.

Always looking on the bright side, that Franck

All the stuff being covered outside the unfriendly confines of the award-winning Dirty Tackle...

Robin Van Persie's son, Shaqueel, makes Arsene Wenger drool. [101gg]

Time is running out on our Messi autographed boots giveaway! [Dirty Tackle]

Shakira now tweeting pictures of her and Pique. [Kickette]

Goalkeeper Rogerio Ceni reaches 100 career goals scored. [The Offside]

How England fell out of love with its own national team. [twofootedtackle]

Russian club pays player $256,000 for sending thugs to beat him into voiding his contract. [The Beautiful Blog]

The FIFA presidential race turns into a verbal smackdown. [Unprofessional Foul]

Sir Alex gets no touchline ban for lewd comments, injury time lapdance. [FistedAway]

Fans boo England and Wales players during terrible national anthem performances. [The Gaffer]

Racist banana strikes again. Even though he wasn't Scottish. Or racist. [Studs Up]