- Brad Evans at Roto Arcade1 day ago
Weeks ago while you were out sunbathing on the beach, smoking brisket in the backyard or improbably attempting to complete the drinking around the world tour at Epcot, Jimmy Graham was on the verge of changing history.
The Saints’ stud, who's humiliated defenses often in his four-year career, was engaged in a position designation battle for the ages. His claim: Due to his overwhelming usage out wide and in the slot, he was more wide receiver than tight end and deserved to be viewed, under a franchise tag, in a similar fashion as the Calvin Johnsons of the football world.
Graham certainly had a point.
[Smack talk season is back at Yahoo Sports: Sign up and play free Fantasy Football!]
- Brad Evans at Roto Arcade3 days ago
By nature, fantasy owners are superstitious creatures of habit. Every league has that one guy/gal who believes some celestial force, if appeased properly, will grant their every fantasy wish. Each year at the draft, these are the people who must sit in a particular spot, sip on the same beverage and arrive draped in a well-worn, partially faded Jimmy Clausen Panthers jersey they, for some bizarre reason, are convinced cultivates good fortune.
Apparently, when the phrase “Luck of the Irish” was coined in the latter half of the 19th century it also applied to crappy ex-Notre Dame quarterbacks.
This group of gypsy-like mystics is also overwhelmingly stubborn. Old dogs and Greg Schiano are more apt to learn new tricks. When rule changes are discussed or scoring tweaks are proposed they remain married to tradition, emphatically voting ‘NO!’ on even the slightest enhancement. In their minds things are fine just the way they are. Why mess with it?
- Brad Evans at Roto Arcade7 days ago
Ups and downs characterize the short careers of Ryan Mathews and Doug Martin. Both have penetrated the RB1 class. Both have triggered massive migraines. In this cage-match to the death, Brad Evans and Andy Behrens beat one another to a bloddy pulp over who you should draft.
Sound the bell ...
The Noise, naturally, professes his renewed love for Mathews:
Well, well, well … our fearless leader, Brandon Funston, gave yours truly an open, unfiltered forum to discuss the merits of the greatest running back in human history, but only in 250 words? Brevity, obviously, will not be honored.
This is Ryan Mathews, my ultimate man-crush/mantasy/baby boo/Tenderoni/honey bunny/love muffin, a man who’s repeatedly broken hearts but regained a fair level of respectability last year.
- Brad Evans at Roto Arcade7 days ago
There are many things in this world I truly don’t understand. Dudes in flip-flops who lift weights at the gym, the popularity of Chihuahuas, why people find listening to Rush enjoyable and satellite TV commercials that insinuate humans copulate with marionettes top the list.
So does the baseless hatred toward Giants RB Rashad Jennings.
The running back’s projected value and where he should be drafted has created a great schism in the ‘expert’ community. Just read my Twitter timeline. Supporters believe Jennings’ fourth-to-fifth round ADP in standard or 12-team PPR leagues is a bargain. He’s a legitimate top-15 candidate who could turn a massive profit. Doubters, meanwhile, are convinced he’s an overpriced, generally unproven dinosaur on a mediocre team that has no business being drafted as an RB2 even in the deepest of leagues.
- Brad Evans at Roto Arcade9 days ago
Almost universally fantasy ‘experts,' both actual and self-proclaimed, have crammed the same, tired strategy down your throat when approaching quarterbacks this season:
WAIT! WAIT! WAIT!
A mountain of supportive evidence and the seemingly endless supply of useful QBs, they say, proves the strategy’s validity. By simply streaming the position, an exercise that sounds great in theory but in reality is more difficult to successfully execute especially in leagues where resources are scarce, one can stockpile talent at more volatile positions on draft day such as running back and wide receiver while maximizing passer matchups in-season. Staunch believers say it’s practically a foolproof plan. Hawk the wire, play the odds and, Voila!, a celebratory Drake-kicks-beats-on-stage-while-Johnny Manziel-rolls-twenties-in-the-bathroom victory party ensues. Last season, the emergence of Nick Foles and Josh McCown and even the occasional serviceability of guys like Ryan Fitzpatrick, Matt Cassel and, during the fantasy playoffs, Geno Smith were testaments.
- Brad Evans at Roto Arcade14 days ago
When it comes to NFL wide receivers Andre Johnson is a bit of a wallflower. Despite wallowing in mediocrity for the better part of 11years – the Texans have just two playoff berths to speak of during that time – he’s been punctual for mandatory practices and camps, kept to himself and churned out consistent production. Unlike so many egotistical WR divas that throw repeated temper tantrums or insist on conceited requests, he remained selfless, a consummate employee, a consummate professional.
However, like anyone who grows tired of the same old (expletive) at work, Johnson has reached a breaking point.
Road meet fork.
- Brad Evans at Roto Arcade18 days ago
Every walk of 21 st century life is tracked, dissected and analyzed by computers. Weather observations banking transactions, twitter reactions, sporting events, tooth fairy payments, the alcohol content scrawled on your beer can – everything, everywhere has a number attached to it providing consumers with multiple angles on a particular subject.
This, after all, is the age of advanced understanding, though some Neanderthals, namely your antiquated mother-in-law and the backwards thinker who penned this column, fail to grasp the importance.
Naturally, fantasy sports, and those who feverishly play them, have certainly benefited.
- Brad Evans at Roto Arcade22 days ago
Beef, pork, mechanically separated turkey, water, corn syrup cubes, hydrolyzed beef stock, sodium phosphates, questionable "flavorings," bat shards, broken dreams and extractives of suck — these are ingredients that comprise baseball's biggest wieners. Just ask the poor bastard who's choked on Justin Verlander.
Coming off savory 2013 campaigns, this year's soured group of tubed meats were expected to exceed or at least meet last year's totals. Acquire them, experts and seasoned owners professed in March, and investors were sure to relish consistent production. As the old saying goes, players, in terms of statistical contribution, are supposed to get plumper when you draft 'em.
However, these Lil Smokies have shriveled in the Crock-Pot.
- Brad Evans at Roto Arcade22 days ago
Decisions, decisions. Fantasy owners are constantly faced with them. In Rounds 3-4 of most 12-team drafts, owners interested in acquiring an RB2 will have to make a tough choice. In today's royal rumble, Scott Pianowski, Brad Evans and Brandon Funston go toe-to-toe over rushing curiosities C.J. Spiller, Andre Ellington and Bishop Sankey.
Ding. Ding. Ding. Let the body slams begin ...
Scotty snacks on some Buffalo wings: The first thing to recognize with Spiller is that we're chasing an established upside, not a theoretical one. He was fantasy's No. 7 back in 2012, averaging a ridiculous 6.0 yards a carry. We've seen how good he can be at his best. And entering his Age-27 season (and a contract year, if that matters to you), I'd like to be invested again.
- Brad Evans at Roto Arcade26 days ago
When Jamaal Charles emasculated would-be Oakland tacklers to the tune of 215 combined yards and five touchdowns nearly six months ago your championship dreams went spiraling down the drain. You thought, "If only the Raiders still had Ted Hendricks or were armed with bazookas …"
Since then, to keep the events of that fateful day off your mind, you've drowned in adult beverages, dabbled in other fantasy sports and even exercised. Sadly, the pain lingers.
Pick your chin up, gamer. Your chance at redemption is just around the corner.
Are you prepared?
Prospective owners are returning to the virtual game in droves and again consuming information in large quantities. As a result, several newsy items jumping off RSS feeds have already begun to sway public opinion, an annual seduction that, in some cases, artificially inflates/deflates draft day prices.